Tag: strange

Coffin Lipstick Holder

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Coffin Lipstick Holder
Is your foundation to die for? Does your mascara look murderous? Is your lipstick the balm? Embalmed? Then get the Coffin Lipstick Holder and let your makeup rest in peace. This is perfect for the creepy girl who has nowhere to store her many shades of black lipstick.

Remember girls, when you kiss a guy all over his face, he shouldn’t come up for air looking like a coal miner. Then again, how else is he gonna find a diamond like you? I know, I’m so sweet. Kiss away ladies. I’m available. Looks like it’s back to the coal mines for me. It’s a tough job, but somebody has to do it.

Mummified Frog Necklace

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Mummified Frog Necklace
Meet Morty, the Mummified Frog Necklace. I’m just guessing that’s his name. He looks like he’s doing a little yoga pose in there. Maybe Downward Frog or… Yeah I don’t know any other yoga poses. I’m about as flexible as a mafia payment plan. Anyway, you’re gonna look croaking in this necklace.

If I see you wearing it, I may even approach you and flirt with you. (Easy with that mace. I’m a good guy.) Maybe make a joke about how you and my tadpole should get together. You’d have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find another prince like me. And that’s nasty,so you might as well just settle. I’ll pick you up at 8.

Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case
This Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case is just what I need for some late night reading before sleepy-time. No wonder I have nightmares. Read me a bedtime story…

There once was a medical quack
who lived in a old wooden shack
He took out his spleen
and washed it all clean
then kissed it and put it back.

Cuz he’s weird. The end.
Read more “Medical Anatomy and Oddities Pillow Case”

Cute Velvet Bat

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Cute Velvet Bat
Damn, that bat is hardcore cute! Put this Cute Velvet Bat in your belfry, car window, pocket, whatever. Who doesn’t love bats? The insects that they eat. That’s who. Otherwise everybody loves a bat. What? You don’t love bats? What’s wrong with you? What, are you batty? This guy looks like a little bat Dracula. Bat-cula.

Graham Is A Nightmare Human Designed To Survive Car Accidents

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Graham Is A Nightmare Human Designed To Survive Car Accidents
What in the many-nippled f**k? This is Graham. This freak of nature is a human designed by Australia’s Transport Accident Commission to survive car accidents. Basically, if you don’t look like this nightmare, you should be more careful when you drive. If you do look like this guy… All hope is lost. Seriously, you ugly son!

You could feed whole litters of cats with those nipples. The idea behind all of those fun bags? That they act like air bags to protect this guy’s ribs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpAmdEmH9I4

via Geekologie