Clown Skull – Bozo’s Bones

Clown Skull - Bozos BonesHave you ever wanted to see what a clown skull looks like? No need to drag a circus clown in front of an X-Ray machine… Well, maybe there is, since that’s always fun. Anyway, check out this cool clown cranium. I always thought that nose was a foam attachment. I guess you are either born a clown or you’re just clowning around.

Fun fact: I was the class clown in school. We all were. It was clown college. I dropped out to pursue a mime career. I was known as “Silent But Deadly- the farting mime”. Hard to make money though, when no one wants to come close enough to drop money in your hat.

Frankenberry, Boo Berry And Count Chocula Action Figures

Frankenberry, Boo Berry And Count Chocula Action FiguresIt’s my 3 best friends, Boo, Frank and Count. joshuaizzo created these for a friend. What, I’m not your friend Josh? What about that time we binged on Boo Berry all night and washed it down with a Franken-Chocula mix? That meant nothing? Oh yeah, I was alone that night, talking to the characters on the boxes. Sorry Josh, but I really want these. Where does your friend live? It would be a shame if something happened to those figures. Know what I mean? I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse. Like 6 boxes of Frankenberry. He’s the weakest link in the awesome spooky cereal chain.

Posable Albino Bat Doll / Hair Clip

Posable Albino Bat Doll  Hair Clip
This Posable Albino Bat Doll / Hair Clip wants to spend its days in your hair and flap it’s wings to keep you nice and air-conditioned. You can also attach it to your clothes, backpack, purse, someone’s back so they scream and run around… It’s albino, it’s poseable, it’s cute, it’s batty.He makes a good little friend to just display in your home.

I’m gonna call mine Pinkeye, cuz he obviously has it. He’s gonna infect me, then we’ll both have it and I will slowly turn into an albino. We will hang together from a cave roof and hunt insects. I’m not gonna poopon the cave floor though, that’s just disgusting. Goodbye human world. Something is happening. Something wonderful… *Screeeeeech*

Hair Of The Sasquatch

Hair Of The Sasquatch
Hows about a little hair of the Sasquatch? I’ve tried to get a sample of bigfoot hair myself, out in the wild, but every time I find some, the lab tests identify it as monkey pubes or whatever. Big foot is really hard to catch. I can’t even get any evidence on them. That Bigfoot probably grabbed a monkey and rubbed it on a tree just to throw me off his scent.

Anyway, you can get yourself some Sasquatch hair that has been preserved in glass. Alright, I’m gonna take a chance and get it. Better not be pubes again.

Pocket Pets: Roach On The Go

Pocket Pets Roach On The Go
Oh yeah, this is a great idea. Give your kid a pet roach that he can hang out with. That’s not weird at all. There’s no way your kid is gonna be an outcast as he walks around with his little pet roach, talking to it in hushed whispers. Then again, my parents gave me a whole house full of roaches and I turned out alright.

Except for my fear of roaches and my waking from a dead sleep so I can slam a shoe against the floor like a madman. There’s also the constant itching, but hey I need to exfoliate anyway right? It’s all good. Anyway, get your kid a little pet roach, cuz, you know, your kid isn’t weird enough. Pocket Pets. Cuz your kid doesn’t need friends.
Read more “Pocket Pets: Roach On The Go”