These ugly and creeptastic salt and pepper shakers look scared as s**t. They should be, since they look like powdered sugar and cinnamon donut hole people. Otherwise known as munchkins in Dunkin Donut land. I’ll down a whole box of these, faces or not.
When they see me coming through the doors of donut heaven and walking up to the counter, they know what I want. They just hand me my box o’ munchkins. The box doesn’t even have a handle, because they know I’ll down ’em before she can even ask if I want a coffee, which I don’t. DD coffee gives you mud butt. Everyone knows that.
The point is, I’m really hungry now and your sweet sugary faces ain’t gonna stop me. But yeah, as salt and pepper shakers, these are real f***ing ugly.
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Etsy seller 
At night I askkkkkkkkk the starssssss up aboveeeeee…Why must I be a Cthulhu in loveeeeeeeeeeee? That was such a sweet song. Too bad anyone who knows it is limping around with a cane right now and bitching about their hip. I only know it because I know the language of love. I’m a real Casanova.
Which came first, the chicken or the legs? Wait, what? What the hell am I looking at, a Pokemon? I’m pretty sure Chickapede evolves into Chickasnake. Whatevs. It all evolves into Chicken Nuggets in the end. This piece of mutant chicken taxidermy comes from Etsy seller 
If you can’t beat them, drink out of their rotten Zombie skulls. Raise a toast and smash their rotted faces together, for tomorrow we battle the undead. Well… The rest of you will battle. I’ll be hiding in a cellar somewhere, wishing you all the best. Then when you get back, I’ll act like I did all the work. Cool?