Category: Geeky Cool Stuff

Fifty Shades of Bacon

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fifty shades of bacon
Now this is the kind of erotic book I can get behind. Nah. Not really. That’d be gross and page after page of people rubbing bacon all over themselves. That’s a waste of bacon. No, this Fifty Shades of Bacon book is a cookbook that delivers the “full bacon experience”.

This is 62 pages with 50 recipes. If I could give awards to books, this one would win my “Golden Coronary” of excellence award. But even if a book won an award, how does a book give an acceptance speech? Simply by reading itself and thereby proclaiming it’s excellence. Bacon. Enough said.

Pro tip: Never judge a book by it’s cover. At first I thought this was a bacon identification guide illustrating fifty shades of bacon color and telling you which are good to eat and which would kill ya from being in the fridge too long. Or not in the fridge at all.

Return Of The Hawn Tawn Space Pirate

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

hawn tawnYou might remember that we featured Deadgreedy’s Hawn Tawn awhile back. And of course as soon as all of you saw it you made Dead Greedy an instant success. The dude is selling his stuff at conventions, making more weird and freaky toys than ever before and basically being an art star. I tried to talk to him when I saw him at a con a few days ago, but he couldn’t be bothered since he had a babe on each arm and was sipping champagne, all while making it rain dollar bills and throwing red skittles at me. He hates the red ones and thought I put them in his dressing room.

Anyway, the dude is doing great for himself and if you missed out on buying that disturbing yet awesome Hawn Tawn figure, it’s now a kickstarter. You can make this figure a reality! For a $50 pledge you can get one of 500 figures for yourself. Maybe cut it open and put your Luke figure in it’s belly to keep him warm. If you like strange custom Star Wars figures, help him make it a reality.

Thanks for the shoutout in the kickstarter video Jeremy and never stop making weird and awesome stuff.
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Awesome Snake Scarf Is One Warm Snake-Cessory

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snake scarf
Sweeet! This snake scarf is exactly what I need to battle the cold and look fashionably creepy this winter. I’ll wear it outside and then shed my scarf like snakeskin when inside again. You can call me Snake Plissken, or Rocky Bal-Boa constrictor. Even Cobra Commander. But don’t call me snake-neck the nerd. Them’s fighting words.

No way I’m wearing it on a plane though. I’ll ask for like one drink too many and the stewardess will be all like, “I have had it with these motherf***in’ snakes on this motherf***in’ plane!” Damn! Chill! Why don’t you sit down beside me and tell me all about it Sam Jackson. And while we’re at it, why the hell are you my stewardess today?
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Realistic Beavis & Butthead Sculptures

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beavis butthead
Heh heh. Heh heh. This sucks. These Realistic Beavis & Butthead Sculptures are all like, lifelike and stuff.

Yeah! Yeah! Heh heh. Those guys look creepy. Heh. They look familiar. Fire! Fire! I am cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!

Sit these guys down in your living room, in front of your TV, and just watch the idiotic magic happen. Unless of course you have kids. In that case, just sit back and watch your own idiots pick their noses and watch TV. I know I gave my parents hours of entertainment. These sculptures are ultra realistic, right down to the braces and bad acne. For $8,300.00 you can have MTV induced nightmares forever. I’m not sure which one scares me more.
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Keyboard Pirates Reminder Memo Note Holders

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keyboard pirates
Shiver me timbers! There be pirates on me keyboard, what look like little ghosts. Are you here to plunder my booty and take all me sexy pictures off me hard drive? I probably shouldn’t have said that. Now ye know! Well, if ye have a use for a bunch of squirrels in bikinis, go ahead and plunder me keyboard, but I’ll not heave to without a fight. Where ye going? Come back! I’m not weird! I just like funny pictures!

These Keyboard Pirates Reminder Memo Note Holders will remind you about stuff that your brain forgets. Just put these note holders on your computer and attach notes to them. Now you’ll remember stuff while you are surfing your favorite websites.