These Scented Beer Bottle Candles are perfect for your mancave. For once you won’t have to get drunk and spill your beer in the wife’s candle to have a beer scented candle. Or spill wax in your beer bottle. Etsy seller UReflections
has done all of the work for you.
No more dumping beer on the carpet to get that smell. Now you can have fresh beer scent even if you don’t live in a beer splattered pigsty of your own making. We truly are living in the future.
There’s a tentacle in my porthole. That sounds like a personal problem to me. Maybe while it’s in there it can give you a checkup. Why you- This post brought to you by the letter V. For the voices. In my head.
Now that the meds have kicked in and everything is going smoothly, I present to you this Tentacle Porthole Lamp. It’s as if a giant Kraken attacked a ship and was nice enough to bring it’s own light for you to die by. This thing is realistic as hell. I feel like I’ve been slimed just by looking at it. This is gonna look awesome in that Kraken themed room I’ve been planning. I have a lot of work to do. Better get Kraken!
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This Fish In A Bag Soap is supposed to look like those fish you win at a carnival that die as soon as you get home and put it in the tank. Of course, the last time that happened it was entirely my fault. Fish flakes/fish sticks? How do I know what they eat? It’s not like I’m friggin’ Aquaman over here.
Be right back! Okay I’m back. Had to remove another floater from the tank. No, not another dead fish. The crapper won’t flush. It’s cool. Just tossed it outside so I can blame the neighbor’s dog later. Aren’t you glad you don’t live by me? Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, fish in a bag. It’s a fun way to keep clean. If you’re a weirdo. Which I am.
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We’ve featured MythicArticulations’ work before when we showed you their creatures in a can, and now they have this Mythical Creature and Cryptid Skeleton Identification Chart. It’s perfect for identifying that creature that you just encountered. Maybe you were relieving yourself in the forest, because you know, nature calls, and your junk got bit by a strange creature.
Well, now you can consult the chart and know that it was a Chupacabra. But that still doesn’t tell you if you need any rabies shots or if the thing laid eggs in you and is going to turn you into a mutant freak. It also doesn’t tell you how to make the swelling go down. Or explain why your junk now has the urge to find a sheep and drink it’s blood. It also doesn’t help you when the farmer catches you with both your junk and a sheep in the middle of a field in broad daylight. Start with, “I can explain”.
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Cuddle Clones is a service that makes a stuffed animal version of your pet from a picture. They look pretty realistic. It gives your dog a doppelganger. Or is that dogpelganger? This service also comes in handy if Fido kicks the bucket. That way you can remember him. If you want to be really weird, you can go right on taking Fido for walksies and poopsies. Hey, whatever floats your boat.
I wonder if they do humans. I not only need a buddy for the carpool lane, I also need something to put in my bed to fool my wife when I sneak out at night to gamble and drink. Nah. I never do anything that manly. It’s mostly just late night computer games and trolling online. If this doppelganger works, the My Little Pony forums won’t know what hit them.
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