McDonald’s Is Selling Secret Big Mac Sauce On Ebay

big mac special sauce
So McDonald’s secret sauce is currently up for auction on eBay. I guess the obesity epidemic, as it is, isn’t obese enough for them. McDonald’s patrons only get exercise walking from the car to the counter before they get stuck in those booths and then kids start throwing nuggets at them for all eternity. Now they are bringing the secret whale sauce to the internets so you can order from your hospital bed.

It’s actually for charity. Not that this will stop Ronald’s soul from rotting in hell with Grimace and the rest of the gang, but it’s a start. Bidding is up to $23,100.00 AU for this bottle of diarrhea dressing.
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Human Anatomy Suitcases

skeleton suitcase
Fans of human anatomy will love these cool yet icky looking suitcases from space24retro, showing off the human body and the fact that we are all just bags of meat and bone all walking around looking weird as hell under our skin. The human anatomy suitcase. Perfect for traveling…long trips to the doctor’s office or a visit to the coroner.

Hopefully they don’t provoke the TSA into giving you a firsthand lesson in human anatomy. No one likes the tickle the colon from the inside game.
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Shotgun Toilet Plunger

shotgun toilet plunger
Do you have a clogged up colon? Has this led to the plumbing in your home also having a clogged colon? First, try more fiber, then get this Shotgun Toilet Plunger. It will make short work of clogged toilets.

Plunging the clogged feces from your toilet has never been more fun. Plunge it down and pull the trigger like you’re a redneck hunting gophers. That’s how a real man clears some pipes.

BOOOOOOOOM. Toilet shatters. Poop fountain sprays everywhere. Okay, who replaced my plunger with a real shotgun? Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. But this is the third time and the landlord is getting pissed guys. Come on!

Vintage Batman Water Gun

batman squirt gun
Holy inappropriateness Batman! This vintage Batman water gun is just plain wrong. It’s bad enough that Batman is bending over, but then you are expected to “pull his trigger” as if giving him a reach-around. That’s when the spray comes out of his mouth.

It was made in the 1960’s. At a time when none of us were perverts and would have never noticed the weirdness/creepiness of this water gun. To top it all off, you refill water directly into the plug on his Bat-butt. Oh well. I guess an enema never hurt anybody. It could be worse. There could be a Robin accessory that refills him.

Vintage Deck of Cards Straitjacket

deck of cards straight jacket
Any 8s? Nope. Go fish. Any Aces? Nope. Go fish. This game is boring. Why don’t we play something else? Like crazy 8s? Well, because that game is too damn crazy. That’s why I have my deck secured in a straight jacket. So it doesn’t hurt itself or others with it’s sharp edges. I also have it taking some pills and talking to a counselor once a week.

This straight jacket for cards is perfect for that one crazy deck you have that’s dangerous and deranged. It would also be perfect for keeping a haunted deck restrained. No cards are escaping this straight jacket!
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