Tag: cool

Set of 10 Alien Crayons – Gray-ola

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Set of 10 Alien Crayons - Gray-ola
Here ya go little Timmy. Take these alien crayons and draw a nice picture for the psychologist, so you can show him what the alien who abducted you looks like. *Looks at the drawing.* Are you sure this is accurate Timmy? Good. *Looks at drawing. Looks at psychologist. Looks back at drawing. Back at psychologist.*

It was you all along Doc! I should have known by your name, Edstra Trey Estreal! And your gray complexion!

I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for those meddling crayons! *Rips his fake human skin off and hops on the wall like Spider-man, before crashing through the window and escaping.*

May Cthulhu Eat This House Last – Cross Stitch

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May Cthulhu Eat This House Last - Cross Stitch
True that! Put this May Cthulhu Eat This House Last – Cross Stitch on your door and Cthulhu will be full by the time he gets to you. Technically, if we all put these on our door, everyone will be safe because we can’t all be last, yet Cthulhu will obey the command. Now we beat him using logic! High five everybody!

*A hellish wind kicks up. Rips the cross stitch off my door.* Oh f**k!

Large Octopus Brooch

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Large Octopus Brooch
I’m not afraid to brooch the subject. This Large Octopus Brooch is the bee’s knees, Cthulhu’s tentacles, Medusa’s locks, Frankenstein’s bolts. Too scared to wear it? Don’t be an octo-puss! This guy has eight arms to hold ya with baby. Plus he’s all ink splattered, like a pen exploded in his face. I hate when that happens. He was probably just writing in his diary and SPLAT, day ruined. Don’t let your day be ruined by missing your chance at a cool accessory.

Brain In A Jar Soap

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Brain In A Jar Soap
Hmmmm. Now where did I put that brain? I might know if I hadn’t misplaced it. But I did so… Me dumb now. Oh there’s my Brain In A Jar Soap. There’s nothing like lathering up with gray matter. What these soaps lack in firing synapses, they make up for in firing suds-napses. I like cleaning with brains, makes me feel smart. Like I am absorbing the knowledge from the brain and adding it to my own database. And believe me, I need all the brainpower I can get.

I’m like a showering zombie. *Approaches the shower muttering, “Brains… Brains* OW! Bumped into the tub and fell in. See, this is why I need brains.
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