Tag: fun

These LEGO Fast Food Buildings Are Making Me Hungry

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

fast food lego buildings
Etsy seller ABSDistributors makes all kinds of cool custom LEGO toys, but the best are these fast food buildings, so your minifigs can go in and eat, get all fat like Americans do. Hey, I’m not knocking it. I’m an American and I’m stuffing my face as I write this, even if it is hard to see the letters on my keyboard thanks to a thick dusting of Cheeto particulate.

They have replica interiors and everything. Once you put your minifigs inside that McDonalds, it will be so realistic that you’ll be complaining about how the kid behind the counter is a dumbass and why is it taking a half hour for one Big Mac and an order of fries anyway? Look, can I speak to your manager? I can’t play with these things. I’m getting way too stressed just thinking about it. WTF! I didn’t order a Sprite! My whole day is ruined now. Why is it so hard to get the order right?

That’s it! I’m dismantling the whole damn thing and putting up an Arbys.
Read more “These LEGO Fast Food Buildings Are Making Me Hungry”

Fleece Sloth Animal Hat

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

fleece sloth hat
This Brown Fleece Sloth Animal Hat will keep you warm, but it will take all damn day to do it. Do you have any idea how slow Sloths are? They’re full of slow slothhy sloth-ness, which is a medical condition. You would have to tell this hat, “Hey, I’m going out next week and it’s going to be cold. I’m gonna put you on my head now. So get your s*it together and start placing your arms in ear-warming and scarf positions now.”

It might be ready by next week if you’re lucky. What the hell is the Sloth’s problem? It’s so damn chill and slow. The stoner of the animal kingdom. Are there no predators you are worried about? Speed it up man! Even I got predators. What’s that? Oh right. Those are creditors. Always get them confused.
Read more “Fleece Sloth Animal Hat”

Custom Gamecube Purse

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Gamecube Purse
This Custom Gamecube Purse is perfect if your name is Princess Zelda or Princess Peach. Also if you want to be able to cave some guy’s skull in when they try to steal your purse. I say, if a woman is going to wear a Gamecube purse, she should at least let a nerd like me plug my controller into her port, but then again, I’ll use any excuse to both talk to a woman and to plug my controller in her port.

Why isn’t it working? You are my dream woman, but where’s your screen? I have to say I’m very disappointed.

Wine-O-Saur Wooden Dinosaur Wine Racks

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

dinosaur wine holder
These Wine-O-Saur Wooden Dinosaur Wine Racks turn your wine bottles into decorative dinosaurs. Wino meet wine-o-saur. Drink up and let the good times roll until your sobriety is good and extinct. I’m more of a Whine-O-Saur. Maybe a Dine-O-Saur.

Hands off that Wine-O-Saur. That wine is… Mine-O-Saur. Gonna drink it with a Min-O-Taur. Until three-0-four. A.M. Then I’m gonna sleep all day because I’ve earned it.
Read more “Wine-O-Saur Wooden Dinosaur Wine Racks”

Last Supper Clothing: Surprisingly Doesn’t Cost 30 Pieces Of Silver

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

last supper skirt and shirt
Dining with Jesus? Wear this Last Super Skirt and Dress! Hey Jesus. What up? Should be a good meal. Did you order yet? I hear the fries are awesome here. What? Nah, it’s just a dress. Doesn’t mean anything. Chill dude. How about turning my water into wine here?*gulp* Gotta be honest. Tastes more like vinegar.

Well it’s been a slice. Gotta go. Hey let me take care of the bill. No, it’s my pleasure. Passes some silver to the guy behind me.
Read more “Last Supper Clothing: Surprisingly Doesn’t Cost 30 Pieces Of Silver”