These Stone Skull Cross Pendants from wayanbrothers are badass. What up Damon! What up Marlon! It’s a crucifix skeleton. A Skele-fix. A Crucible of cruci-bones. A cross of calcium. It’s stone cold awesome. Let’s make a petition so that priests have to wear these. I just need your signature right here. Boom! You been scammed bro! You just signed up for a pyramid scheme and I’m at the top, watching all you slaves build the pyramid. Faster! Faster slaves! Oh dang! There’s a guy above me and he just got all the profits. No wonder the Egyptians gave up on pyramids.
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Tag: halloween
Monster Light Switch Cover Plates
*Flips switch* Ow! Cut my finger on the teeth again. Ow! Damnit! Now I probably have an infection from Monster saliva. What the hell. I didn’t need the lights on anyway. Gonna use candles from now on. Stupid Monster Light Switch Cover Plates. Plus, that puddle of drool/saliva on the floor under the light switch is probably a safety hazard. These guys still aren’t housebroken. And I’m sick of brushing their teeth once a month! That’s more than I brush my own.
If you don’t mind all that, you can choose from this one or this one.
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Skeleton Hands Napkin Holder
Everybody put your skeleton hands together for this Skeleton Hands Napkin Holder. It uses both hands to hold your napkins and looks like it is doing so while raising out of a tar pit. When it has no napkins to hold, it just looks like it’s getting ready to clap. Stop giving yourself a hand and give me a napkin already Skeletor! Thanks! High five! No, stop clapping. No more! Stop! Why do you keep giving me the clap?
That came out wrong. I don’t have the clap. You… Stop having the clap. That someone gave you. Shut your stupid claptrap!
Gross Eyeball Pen
This Gross Eyeball Pen is nasty. The problem is that it sees everything you write. You won’t have any secrets when you use this pen. You write something it doesn’t like, then it’s gonna eyeball you. It seems to have some festering blisters on it too. Yeah you ugly eyeball pen. I bet you show it a mirror and it wrecks its ugly self. I’m gonna make a special single sunglass for this thing. It will never look cool, but this will help.
Horror Movie-Inspired Pop-Tarts From Kill-oggs
Pop-Tarts. It’s what’s for dinner! Although these might make you lose your appetite. Artist Newt Cloninger-Clements created these Horror Movie-Inspired Pop-Tarts for a not so well balanced breakfast. In fact, it’s a very unstable breakfast, with tendencies toward murder and gore. That “Evil Dead” version is just perfect. I also dig the Nosferatu flavor. Nosfera-tart! Hit up Newt Cloninger-Clements page for more. Try not to eat too many kids, cuz Pop-Tarts can turn into Pop-Sharts in a heartbeat and you didn’t bring a change of pants.
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