Tag: mythical creature

Mythical Creature and Cryptid Skeleton Identification Chart

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Mythical Creature and Cryptid Skeleton Identification Chart
We’ve featured MythicArticulations’ work before when we showed you their creatures in a can, and now they have this Mythical Creature and Cryptid Skeleton Identification Chart. It’s perfect for identifying that creature that you just encountered. Maybe you were relieving yourself in the forest, because you know, nature calls, and your junk got bit by a strange creature.

Well, now you can consult the chart and know that it was a Chupacabra. But that still doesn’t tell you if you need any rabies shots or if the thing laid eggs in you and is going to turn you into a mutant freak. It also doesn’t tell you how to make the swelling go down. Or explain why your junk now has the urge to find a sheep and drink it’s blood. It also doesn’t help you when the farmer catches you with both your junk and a sheep in the middle of a field in broad daylight. Start with, “I can explain”.
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Nessie Loch Ness Monster Ladle

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lochness monster ladle
Now you can have a Nessie sighting with every meal. And you will even have proof. Who said Nessie wasn’t real? Just throw your current ladle out right now. This is the best ladle ever.

It has 4 little legs that stand it upright on your counter and it will look just like Nessie as it sits inside your soup. Make sure you take a pic every time and alert the tabloids!
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Mythical Creature Dioramas

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mythical creature diorama chupacabra
These mythical creature dioramas from Etsy seller PearsonMaron are a fun way to celebrate El Chupacabra, Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster. These fun and cartoony scenes make these terrifying creatures a little friendlier. I’m sure that Chupacabra is not going to suck all of the blood from that goat. He’s just gonna- Oh, who am I kidding? He is going to rip that goat a new throat-hole and then go back to the underground lab that genetically spawned him.

These creatures scare me to death. The other day I visited a petting zoo and spotted some hoof prints in the snow and I knew that either a Chupacabra or a demon was on the loose.

Those were just baby goat tracks.

Really? Then how do you explain the fact that they were FOLLOWING that baby goat from behind? I never did see it again. It’s the same way I know when a Bigfoot is following me. His tracks are always leading right TO ME. I am so close to cracking this conspiracy.
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It Does Exist!: Loch Ness Monster Salt & Pepper Set

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loch ness monster salt and pepper setSweet! This Loch Ness Monster Salt and Pepper set will complete my mythical creature salt and pepper shaker collection. I already have Bigfoot, the Chupacabra and Mothman!

I thought I saw the Loch Ness Monster once, but those humps sticking out of the water were just a family of overturned obese people in inner tubes. They went all sideways when I zipped past on my jetski. Haha! Take that you-

*slams against the side of a boat. Falls into water. Sinking. Snake like form swims toward me. Circles around. Farts. Then leaves laughing.*

Did I see Nessie? The nurses say it was the morphine, but I’ll always believe that Nessie saved me. He disrespected me for sure, but those farts brought me to the surface…I know what I saw. I know what I smelled.