Tag: office

Freddy Krueger, Jason, Chucky And Michael Myers Paperweights

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horror movie paperweights
These Freddy Krueger, Jason, Chucky And Michael Myers Paperweights will hold your papers down like they were just another bad script for an unnecessary sequel. Having some horror movie heads on your desk will remind you that things could be worse. Instead of being stuck in the office, you could be one of their victims. Suddenly office work doesn’t sound so bad huh? Now get that report on my desk asap. I’ll be in my office looking up asap in the dictionary.

These heads probably connect to form some crazy Voltron super-horror entity. Don’t use that Hollywood. It’s documented. If you use it you now owe me.

Keyboard Pirates Reminder Memo Note Holders

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

keyboard pirates
Shiver me timbers! There be pirates on me keyboard, what look like little ghosts. Are you here to plunder my booty and take all me sexy pictures off me hard drive? I probably shouldn’t have said that. Now ye know! Well, if ye have a use for a bunch of squirrels in bikinis, go ahead and plunder me keyboard, but I’ll not heave to without a fight. Where ye going? Come back! I’m not weird! I just like funny pictures!

These Keyboard Pirates Reminder Memo Note Holders will remind you about stuff that your brain forgets. Just put these note holders on your computer and attach notes to them. Now you’ll remember stuff while you are surfing your favorite websites.

Monster Pencil Holders

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

monster pen holder
These pencil holders from Morgan’s Mutations will make your desk a terrifying place. But at least your pencils will be organized and stabbed into the heads of these grotesque monstrosities. The ones with the long tongues are especially scary. Get your number 2 pencils and your nightmares ready!

Use it to hold pencils, pens, anything that needs tidying up on your desk. It will also store and feed off of your fear, but I think that’s pretty obvious. These are great if you have a pen thief in the office. They won’t have the guts to reach for one now. You might even put a fake bitten off finger in there as a warning.
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Five Finger Fillet Pen Holder With Custom Pens

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finger fillet pen holder
I used to be the king of Five Finger Fillet back in the days when I had five fingers. Scratch that! I’m still the king baby! You don’t have to worry about slicing fingers that aren’t there. All hail the king minions! Give me five! I mean slap me two. Spot me one! Played again and now there’s none!

Imma get this Five Finger Fillet Pen Holder so I can relive the glory days of spurting blood and screaming like a baby. It comes with it’s own custom pens and basically looks like a liquid metal Terminator hand stabbing itself.

Chalkboard Skull

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

chalkboard skull
Ancient humans knew how to leave notes for each other. They would just take some ash from their fires and write on the skulls of their dearly departed. They had plenty of writing space too since everyone died at like 23 back then. Once you hit puberty you knew it was all over.

Now you can write messages on skulls too thanks to this handy Chalkboard Skull. They come in all kinds of different fancy colors and styles. Or you could just, you know, use the skull you have and write messages on your own head in sharpie. That’s what I do. Which is probably why I only remember to get eggs when I look in the mirror. Or when I’m walking down the street and people point and laugh, saying, “Hey eggs” or “It’s the egg-man!”