The joy of victory. The agony of de feet! This Concrete Feet Planter is supposed to be a humorous and fun planter for your garden. Maybe it is. It beats the way I do it. By throwing old sneakers into the backyard and then watching flowers grow in them. And die from the smell in the same day. When I say flowers, I mean fungus. Fungi? Why yes I am. I’m a fun guy. A fun guy with a backyard full of old mushroom filled sneakers.
This made me think of this! I know right? *Shudders*
You’re so snuggly Mr. Teddy Man. Will you make all of my dreams come true and love me forever? You’re so sweet. I wish I could lay here forever in your manly embrace. But I have to go to work and pine for you for the next 8 hours, while I wonder why I don’t have a real man. Oh no! I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. Please don’t leave me! I can do better. I can change. I didn’t mean it! Please don’t- Oh, you aren’t leaving. I’m sorry. You really are the best. I don’t deserve you.
What’s up formaldehyde face? It looks like your head fell in the cheese dip back in 1957. You. You’re okay. This one? Real f**kin ugly. I’m not saying that nothing would happen after a couple of drinks, though.
This They Live mask makes you look like one of those aliens that secretly controls the world. I’m surprised I can see it for what it is. I’ve spent like 4 years checking out every pair of sunglasses in every store and I haven’t found the magic pair yet, that will let me see our true masters.
Well damn. That is one ugly little flying freak. I thought fairies were supposed to be beautiful twinkling creatures, trailing pixie dust from their wings and farting sunshine. These guy’s trailing brown crusty dust from his wings and farting real farts that clear the whole fairy tree house out.
Look at this Mummified Talon Fairy holding it’s hands to it’s breasts like, “Don’t hate me because I’m ugly.” Too late. Don’t ugly me and I won’t hate ya.
Wait! That says “Specimen 2948”. How many of these things are there? And do we have enough insecticide to protect ourselves? Nah. Just kidding. I would never do that. But I would clean my sliding glass door to perfection so they fly into it. Then I’d start numbering my own specimens and selling them.
Read more “Mummified Talon Fairy”
Make your fridge a house of horrors with these cool Horror Movie Character Magnets. I mean, more horrible than it already is. For God’s sake clean up that pile of mold in the corner behind that furry ham! I’m talking to you. You know who you are. Bonesart has enough of these cool magnets to cover your fridge in horror icons.
You can choose from the shark from Jaws, Cthulhu, Jason Voorhees, The Creature from The Black Lagoon and more. It’s like a horror icon reunion and you are the host. Pretty cool stuff. Seriously, clean that fridge. Damn! Why does that cheese have green polka-dots?
Read more “Horror Movie Character Magnets”