Um…. WTF! This Weird Foot Creature With Dripping Mucus Action is messed up. It’s has a foot body, with snot dripping from two holes, there’s a head on the other side with more toys coming out from under the chin and the thing has feet of it’s own. Either this is a thing that actually exists or I just started randomly tripping balls. Both of those things are possible. Either way, I just want it to end.
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Tag: foot
Concrete Feet Planter
The joy of victory. The agony of de feet! This Concrete Feet Planter is supposed to be a humorous and fun planter for your garden. Maybe it is. It beats the way I do it. By throwing old sneakers into the backyard and then watching flowers grow in them. And die from the smell in the same day. When I say flowers, I mean fungus. Fungi? Why yes I am. I’m a fun guy. A fun guy with a backyard full of old mushroom filled sneakers.
This made me think of this! I know right? *Shudders*
Weird Anatomy Keychains
I’m a simple dude. I don’t need see how the sausage is made. I just wanna wolf it down. Just like I don’t need to see the insides of humans. It’s gross. Which is why Doctor’s are messed in the head. What 5 year old says. “When I grow up I want to cut other people open and stick my hands all up in ’em!”? Doctors, that’s who!
Etsy seller tcustom has all kinds of human anatomy keychains and they ain’t no better than doctors! *Spits.* Now get off my lawn. Brains and insides is icky and gooey!
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Zombie Foot Toe Monster
Holy ingrown toenail horn. That is gonna require some tough actin tinactin! This Zombie Foot Toe Monster knows the thrill of victory, but also the agony of de-feet! What the hell is it even doing there in the garden? Demanding a foot rub? If I gave in, I would have to scrub my hands clean with fire afterward. But I’m not. I’m not giving in. Not unless you rub mine first.
*Takes off my sock and a thick green vapor like a stinky cheese genie escapes. The plants instantly wilt and decay. Zombie foot freak scurries away choking* Looks like you have met your match Zombie foot. Sucks though. Was looking forward to a foot rub.
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Squirrel Foot Key Holder
I’ve never had a squirrel punch it’s little hand through my wall and present keys to me, but I’m super stoked that this is now a possibility in my life. This Squirrel Foot Key Holder can make it happen. The little furry dude would put a hole in my wall, hold out the keys for me and I would hand him his nuts that I keep in my pocket.
I’m off to the store. Boom! Here’s your keys! I’m out. Keys! Now! Boom! Here you are boss. Sweeeeeet! Of course, within about 2 weeks my hallway would look like swiss cheese from all of the holes in the wall. Then I’d have to get my keys in another room. And another. And another. Until the house falls down all around me one day and I see that little hand punch up out of the debri, offering me my keys one last time. *teary eyed*
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