If you want to look like a mad scientist cut you up and stitched you back together, check out these Frankenstein Monster Stitches Tights. They are scary sexy. They’ll leave you in stitches. For real.
These are perfect for cosplay or just for everyday wear when you want to look like a leggy monster. Who doesn’t want to look like a leggy monster?
This jewelry has bite. How annoying would I be with these Gold And Silver Vampire Rings? Putting my hands against people’s necks and telling them, “I want to suck your blood!” before getting punched in the Nosferatu. It would be pretty cool to wear these vampire choppers.
I’ll give one to my special vampire girl and she’ll say, “Fangs a lot! You really stoke the fires of my heart.”
Is your heart named Bram? Cuz I’m a real Bram Stoker and you have all the right vampire lestats!
Read more “Gold And Silver Vampire Rings”
Goosh. It means “The undesired oozing of any substance, such as jelly in a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.” Example: This peanut butter and jelly sandwich just gooshed all over me! Well, these Goosh Pants aren’t oozing PB and J. Looks more like truffle butter to me, but I’m no expert.
These pants are gooshing in the front and gooshing in the back. Duck duck goosh baby! Dude looks like a walking Rorschach test. That’s me by the time laundry day comes around again. I really need to have more than two pair of pants.
These dinosaur rings are ready to get on your fingers and fight to the death. ROooooooooaaaaarrrrrr! Do I make a convincing dinosaur? Aside from my prehensile tail I mean. Did they even have that? Who knows. This has been another fun game brought to you by my lack of education in the public school system.
Fun fact: I almost wrote pubic school system and giggled a little. Then I ate a PB & J sandwich and here we are. Where were we? Oh yeah. Dinosaur rings. It’s what we would all be deep frying instead of onions if they had never gone extinct. But they did, so we don’t. Dinosaurs I mean. Not onions. Onions are still here.
No need to cry about it.
I’m not. Just chopping onions.
Cool.
Evil Clown Skull Heels. Nice shoes Bozo! Surprisingly they are not huge like clown shoes. According to the seller they are technically “evil clown shoes with glitter soles”. But no souls of their own until they take yours. Through your feet, which will look like a carnival of horrors.
I’m pretty sure the devil wears these. Not Prada. But won’t know until I check the wife’s shoe collection.