Three Alien Wisemen Christmas Ornament Set

Three Alien Wisemen Christmas Ornament Set
You know how the pyramids were built by aliens? Well they also visited baby Jeebus and came bearing gifts. All around the world, people celebrate the three alien wisemen who arrived that day to see the boy king of kings and now you can celebrate this trio in your own home by displaying the Three Alien Wisemen Christmas Ornament Set.

You get Grog’nok, Pilch’nark and Gil’mek all carrying the ceremonial stars to give to baby Jeebus as a gift. One by one they approached the manger and gave the gift, and in doing so, exposed their nakedness to everyone in the manger. It is the alien way. Bring only enough to cover yourself and then run back to the spacecraft.

And so we celebrate and we remember with these special keepsakes.
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Body Wrapped In Bag Christmas Ornament

Body Wrapped In Bag Christmas Ornament
Wow. That’ll get Santa’s attention and make him soil his jolly old pants. This Body Wrapped In Bag Christmas Ornament is sure to make the big guy recheck his nice and naughty list. He may even start a new list and call it “Serial Killer. Do not visit next year. Call the police!” If you are looking to decorate a darker tree this year, this ornament is perfect. Hey, at least it isn’t floating down a river somewhere.

Yeah this will compliment all of those newspaper clippings you have on your wall, with the scribbled red writing and Xs over people’s faces. Damn son, your stockings are hung on the chimney with terror!

These Cool Monster Mugs Will Bite Your Face Off

These Cool Monster Mugs Will Bite Your Face Off
Etsy seller MonsterMug isn’t called that because of their acne problem or cuz they are just plain ugly. They may be horrendous. Don’t know, never met them. I’ve heard stories though. But they go by that name cuz they make awesome and scary monster mugs. Kinda like that lady cashier I always run into at the Quicky Mart, except those are monster jugs. Really, nothing at all like that, except that it rhymes.

These mugs are fun and playful, but scary and they look like they want to bite your face off. One question: If I’m drinking out of a monster mouth? Are we swapping spit?
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Addam’s Family Candle Set

Addams Family Candle Set
They’re creepy and they’re kooky, mysterious and spooky. They’re all together ooky. Uncle Fester took a dookie. The Addams Family…. Holy Morticia, this is a cool Addam’s Family Candle Set. The candle light shows through the images, making them look all extra scary. What kind of a name is Wednesday Addams anyway? Who names their kid after a day of the week? I guess it’s better than calling your kid “hump day”. These candles are going to look awesome in your home. Especially if your shelves are like mine and full of cobwebs cuz you don’t clean. My houses is haunted. By laziness.

Ouija Board Cutting Board

Ouija Board Cutting Board
If I cut cheese on this Ouija Board Cutting Board, does that make it a Cheeja cutting board? Is that a cheesy joke? Anyhow, if you cut the cheese on a ouija board, it upsets the spirits. Boy did I learn that the hard way during a seance. Yeah, I woke the dead alright. The medium was gagging through a handkerchief, people passing out, the planchette just freaking out, whirling around the board and highlighting NO over and over and GOODBYE, like it wanted to commit suicide. I was the last one standing and I wasn’t invited back.

But enough about me. How have you been? It’s been so long. I feel like we never talk. K bye!