Tag: animal

Rattlesnake iPhone 6 Case

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rattlesnake i phone 6 case
Sweeeet! Check out this Rattlesnake iPhone 6 Case. You can set your ringtone to a snake hiss and look all awesome when you pull your phone out with a Rattlesnake head attached. Even if it will bite you with every call.

Too bad I can’t use it. I just upgraded to an iPhone 3. Of course I also recently upgraded to a computer smaller than a refrigerator. It is SO nice to be able to see pictures on the internet. I had no idea that Facebook really was full of faces. That thing has faces everywhere. I’m in the process of moving over from Myspace. Ah hell. BRB The ice delivery guy is here. Now I can buy groceries! WOOT!

Rabbit Hoodie, For Hopping Down The Bunny Trail

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Rabbit Hoodie
Eh, What’s up doc? I knew I shoulda made that left at Albuquerque. Ain’t I a stinker? No, really I am a stinker. It’s July and like 100 effing degrees as I blog in a pair of ratty old socks and more-than-off-white underwear. And seeing this Rabbit Hoodie makes it feel even hotter.

On a somewhat, but not really related note, I taught I taw a puddy tat! Ib-a ib-a That’s all folks!

P.S. What a maroon!

Dragon Shoulder Companion

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shoulder riding dragon
Is that a dragon on your shoulder or are you just happy to see me? Maybe a little of both, since I’m always happy to see someone with a plate full of french fries. *Grabs a bunch. Feeds some to my Dragon Shoulder Companion and stuffs the rest in my mouth. Sits down across from my dragon-less friend.*

Yes you can take my order. I’ll have enough raw meat for two. *Waits. Meat arrives* Do your thing Drago! *Dragon shrieks and breaths fire, cooking our meat and burning my dragon-less friend to a crisp. Everyone runs for the door.*

So how have you been? You’re looking a bit ashen. Why so quiet? *Taps him on the shoulder. Burnt jaw falls to the table.* Time to get out of here Drago. Bad Drago. Our dead friend is not food. C’mon we gotta stay one step ahead of the law. And the fire department.
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Creepy Plague Doctor Mask

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creepy plague doctor mask
“The Plague Doctor will see you now.”

“Oh thank God. Hey Doc I got this- WTF! What kind of foul trick is this? Where did you get your doctorate? Perdue? Get it? Cuz your a bird faced weirdo? You gonna give me a flu shot? Let me guess. Is it the bird flu? Or the bird flew? Damn I crack myself up. You look like a flapper. Wing flapper that is! Well, you probably already gave me the plague so I’m outta here to go spread it.”
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Dinosaur Bride & Groom Wedding Cake Toppers

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dinosaur bride and groom cake topper
Do you take this T-Rex, in extinction and in health, till death do you part by fiery meteor shower that reigns death upon the Earth? You do? You may now kiss the bride.

These Dinosaur Bride & Groom Wedding Cake Toppers are perfect for couples who can’t hug each other due to small stubby arms. Or, you know, just people who like dinosaurs. Which reminds me, I have a Jurassic Park playset and action figures that I need to get back to. Laterz!
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