Demented Baby Doll Wall Art

creepy doll wall art
Yeah, these pieces of Demented Baby Doll Wall Art are pretty nightmare inducing. You can hang your keys from their tiny freaky hands and use them as a coat rack or just stare at them and wig the hell out. I can picture these in my house and I ain’t scared at all.

*Opens the front door after a long day* Daddy’s home babies! *The nightmare creep babies all push through the walls with their freaky little hands reaching out and their heads protruding from the wall. A productive and well behaved nightmare army.* Baby hands grab my keys, while another pair grabs my coat. This is the life. I just can’t get too close to the wall. I must never let them collectively grab at me and pull me into their dark abyss beyond the walls. *Shudders* But seriously, it’s super sweet child labor without the illegality and guilt.
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American Werewolf In London Painting

american werewolf in london painting
Yep. I went on a trip to London last year and this American Werewolf In London Painting looks about right. Except my sweatpants were hanging way lower and I prefer Burger King. Plus, my bike had a bell.

Ding ding. Ding ding. Fat American tourist coming through. Out of the way. You damn English make it impossible to juggle 3 Whoppers, 4 orders of fries, a happy meal and an ice cream cone.

On the plus side Londoners are really good about you falling off of your bike and having a heart attack. Got me an ambulance in no time. Thanks Gov! Health care there is awesome too. I was on my feet and back to being a disgusting American in no time. MURICA!

Basket Full Of Skulls

skull eggs basket
Nothing says creepy like a basket full of skulls. Hey, why not? I put a basket of fruit on the counter and it just goes bad. It’s not like I eat fruits and vegetables. If I did, I would not have just marked the second week of no pooping on my calendar. It has now become an official holiday, since my cramps made me stay home from work today. My boss does not agree.

Nah. I lied. I don’t work. My full time job remains squeezing and grunting until I pass out. Sure it would be much easier if I just ate a friggin’ vegetable once in a while, but I ain’t no quitter. I start something, I see it through. I’ll get it out eventually. How the hell did I get from “basket of skulls” to this?

Just stressed. I’m pooped from trying to poop.
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Nightmare Decor: Nosferatu Head

nosferatu vampire taxidermy head
Bring me the head of Nosferatu at once! Damn, that was fast! To be honest, I’m not sure what to do with it now that I have it. Didn’t really think you would deliver.

This Nosferatu head looks terrifying from one side and extra terrifying from the other. That’s because the other side is exposed so you can see his brains. This might not have happened had he not been so negative. Nosferatu. Pffft! How about YESferatu? He was always so contrary.
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Skull Wall Sconces

skull light sconces
Check it out. What we have here is some mood lighting that is stuck on one mood, and one mood only, creepy. These Skull Wall Sconces will make your house look like an awesome fantasy castle. “From this day forth I shall make skull sconces of my enemy’s heads! This I swear!”

It’s a lot easier than what I did to get that whole Game of Thrones castle look. It took me like 3 weeks to dig that 10 foot wide mote around my house. And only about a minute for it to fill up with sh*t after I hit the sewer lines. Now it’s known around the neighborhood as Casa de la Caca. They also call me lord of the flies.