Tag: cookies

Edible Dracula Coffin Cookies

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Edible Dracula Coffin Cookies
These Edible Dracula Coffin Cookies look delicious. I would buy ’em if I had the dough. Also would bake ’em if I had the dough. Which I dough not.

*Hack* *Hack* *Wretch* *Coughs all over a sheet of freshly baked cookies.*

You okay man? You sound like you’re hacking up a lung.

I’m fine. Just making some coughin’ cookies. Can’t make ’em without coughin’. *Looks at the recipe.* Ohhhhhhh. I see what I did wrong. Coffin, not coughin’! Oh well, everybody eat up. You might as well call in sick for work tomorrow right now. Patient zero is in the kitchen!

Update: These are cookie toppers. Not cookies. Cuz I’m a hungry idiot.

UFO And Alien Cookies

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UFO And Alien Cookies
Celebrate your latest alien abduction or UFO sighting by munching on these colorful UFO And Alien Cookies. You know how I celebrated my first abduction? Preparation H. Also, by not being able to sit down for like a week. *Shakes fist at sky aliens* But I admit, that time I showed up in the ER with that Boba Fett action figure lodged in my Sarlacc Pit, that was all me. I learned to clean up my toys before jumping on the couch that night. Poor Boba was never the same. Neither was I! WHY did it have to be the one bounty hunter with a rocket on his back?

These cookies would have made both of those incidents better. Unless aliens showed up while I was eating them. Then I’d have to toss my cookies. At them.

Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween

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Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween
I love cookies. I’m a real cookie monster and not just because I have blue fur and googly eyes. I just love ’em. So maybe I can get my wife to buy these Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween from AlgisCrafts. Even if the wife doesn’t bake any cookies, it will make a nice change of pace having all of my bruises in fun shapes like skulls, bats and spiders.

They have all kinds of rolling pins. Personally I think they look like they might really hurt. I’m not so hungry for cookies anymore.
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Zombie Cookies: The Walking Delicious

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zombie cookies
These zombie cookies look pretty grotesque thanks to some nice gory details. They may look rotten but they are actually sweet. Om nom nom! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp!

Hey, why are all of my zombie cookies missing their heads?

Headshots! You’re welcome! Now you can eat them safely. I also bit the heads off of all of your goldfish crackers just to be safe. Enjoy your bag of tails and let me know if there’s anything else I can do to help maam!
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Ugly Christmas Sweater Cookies

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ugly christmas sweater cookiesThese ugly Christmas sweater cookies seem to be sold out right now, but if you ask the seller they might make you some. I don’t think they’re ugly. They look delicious. I think I have some of those exact ones.

Hopefully they don’t taste like my sweater. Booze and regret mixed with a bunch of meh and a touch of bah humbug. Nah, I’m just kidding. I’m just bummed I can’t eat all of these sugary sweaters. Also bummed that when I add water to my current sweater and wring her out, no more booze. I guess it’s back to the store for me.