SWEET! This John Carpenter’s The Fog action figure is gonna be the coolest in my collection. It’s highly articulated, fully lifelike and extremely detailed. That’s movie accurate right there son! The Fog is rolling in baby! You think your action figure is cool. Well fog you! This one is better. Just don’t open it or it will be lost forever!
Tag: custom
Custom Nosferatu Vampire Tank Dress
Man, Nosferatu gets all the girls. Lucky guy. If I was clinging to that body the way this Nosferatu Vampire Tank Dress is, I’d get slapped. Is it a tank top? Is it a dress? I have no idea, but Nosferatu is on the scene, creeping around that girl’s boobies. Oddly enough I’ve heard the same phrase uttered about me. I have to work on my game. Right now I’m at checkers level, but one day I’m gonna be in the world championships of hitting on pretty women. Mind if I practice? Here are some pick up lines:
If I told you I loved Nosferatu, would you hold him against me?
Mind if I rub his bald head?
You must have turned me into a vampire girl, cuz I’m up all night thinking about you.
I think I need a lot of work.
Shave And Play Barbie Doll
Damn Barbie. You really let yourself go! Shave and Play Barbie is hairy as hell and ready for a trim! I thought this was a wolfman doll at first. Or a limited edition sasquatch Barbie. Or an Oregon hipster wife Barbie. Nope, just Barbie going all natural and letting that hair grow. And grow. And grow. It comes with a razor included to make her all silky smooth. She’s got a beard, neck hair, chest hair, leg hair, probably even some butt hair.
She did it Fur Ken. She wants to be fur-ever yours. Damn Barbie. You live in a Malibu beach house so I know you can afford a razor. Seriously, SHAVE and PLAY. In that order. Do not PLAY and SHAVE. This beast needs to be dealt with right now! Even Bigfoot be like, “What? Girl you crazy.”
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Vampire Hunter Journal With Stake And Cross On Chain Bookmark
Vampire hunters have all the coolest gear. Sharpened stakes, garlic, fancy crosses that burn vampire flesh, and journals like this awesome Vampire Hunter Journal.
First entry- Dear diary, today I staked a vampire. I mean, I staked out his lair. I didn’t have the courage to go inside and stake him. That pale and goth looking creepy son of a witch has to pay for his late night feeding on innocent women at the local clubs.
Two days later- Getting my courage up now. He rises when the sun goes down and sleeps in the day. Gonna do it tonight.
The next day- I did it! I did it! I broke into his house and staked him while he slept in his coffin. Well, he was sleeping in a normal bed for some reason. And he didn’t turn into ash when I drove the stake in! What have I done? I think I just killed a random goth teen! A quick examination of the room turned up a bunch of Hot Topic receipts. Also, an inspection of the home revealed parents sleeping in the same house too. I think I’m in big trouble now. This will be my last entry. Vampire hunting isn’t for me. I don’t want to go to jail…
Cthulhu Ski Mask Warms Your Tentacles
This Cthulhu Ski Mask is awesome. Yet terrifying. It’s the best way ever to keep all of your tentacles warm in the winter. You probably shouldn’t wear this when you rob a store, but I know you will. You scamps.
Can you describe the man that robbed you?
Well, he was about this tall, had some horns, had a bunch of tentacles and looked like an ancient evil that has just awakened. That should narrow it down.
Laugh if you want, but Cthulhu will tell ya, your tentacles get pretty cold in the winter months. They have been known to snap off like icicles in extreme temperatures.