Altered Alien Figurines

Altered Alien Figurines
We’ve featured FindersCreepers work before. She likes to do naughty things to vintage figurines. The truth is out there and now it is on your knick-Knack shelf. At least until some Man In Black comes and steals it, tells you you never saw it, it was never there, you were mistaken, there is no such thing as Altered Alien Figurines. Screw you MIB. I know what I saw! Great, now there’s an empty spot on my shelf where there’s no dust. Also that MIB left his dark glasses. Let’s check them out.

*Puts glasses on. Sees the words CONSUME, OBEY and SLEEP all over the place.* Pfft! Tell me something I don’t know. *Tosses glasses.*
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Medusa Gorgon Wall Plaque

Medusa Gorgon Wall Plaque
This Medusa Gorgon Wall Plaque is gonna look great on your wall. Most people think that an evil woman with snakes in her hair, who will turn you to stone with one look, is just a myth. Those people never met my ex wife. Statues? Those people have met my ex wife. And now they get to hang out in museums and stuff, where I make fun of their little pee-pees and try to chip a piece off.

Still, those are some lovely locks. You go girl! It’s like a friggin’ Pantene commercial up in this mother. Give me the hair flip. Oh girl, you got it going on. Flip that luxurious and biting mane. Run your hand through it- Oh there goes your hand. It’s just a bloody stump now. It’s cool, you have another. I want to see some intensity in those eye sockets!

Post Human Vampire Skulls

Post Human Vampire Skulls
These Post Human Vampire Skulls are gonna give me nightmares. Apparently these things were genetically enhanced to give them improvements over the average human. It’s like The Terminator and Dracula had a baby and that baby ate the world, draining one corpse at a time, then plugging it’s cyborg self into some receptacle and charging up. Still, dudes got a great profile. I’d kill to look that awesome in pictures. That’s like a quality yearbook picture from Killer Vampire Robot High. Picture like that will land you a sweet wife and an awesome job.

Unlike me. My picture landed me an angry wife and weird job blogging about strange and freaky stuff. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Anyhow I don’t think I could type without a woman screaming in the background anymore and the occasional object sailing past my head. NO, I WILL NEVER STOP USING THE FANCY DINNERWARE TO CUT MY SNICKERS BARS WITH A FORK AND KNIFE! THANK YOU FOR ASKING!
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Sugar Skull Car Floor Mats

Sugar Skull Car Floor Mats
These Sugar Skull Car Floor Mats will make your car more colorful and creepy. Cuz let’s face it, you need something cool to drop your coffee and car-food all over. Etsy seller InkandRags has all kinds of colors and styles available. Pretty cool. Normally if I want a sugar skull I have to down like 5 Twix bars, a snickers and some pixie dust, wash it down with a big gulp and wait for the sugar high to give way to the sugar headache, but this is a much better way to have a sugar skull.

I’m all about the skulls and roses. I have like 3 skulls in my rose garden alone- Uh. Said too much. Really sucks that my backspace key doesn’t work. So it was just a joke. jk everyone. Ha ha. I’m so silly. Later peeps. Gotta go take care of some stuff. Nothing to see here. Catch ya on the flip side.
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Classic B Movie Film Poster Fridge Magnets

Classic B Movie Film Poster Fridge Magnets
If you like classic B movies, check out these Classic B Movie Film Poster Fridge Magnets from BvdBDesign. They have all of the classics. Just stick them on your fridge and you will be reminded about how awesome they are. Awesomely under budget! If we give good movies an Oscar, we need to give these an Oscar Mayer. That’s a trophy of a hot dog in case you didn’t get it. Nah. I kid. These movies are all awesome.

I only give the Oscar Mayer award to street hot dog vendors that I feel have excelled at their craft and created a masterpiece. No, seriously! I have a whole case of the things. Bought em wholesale. By now every hot dog vendor in the city has one. Everyone’s a wiener!
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