Tag: halloween

Sexy Space Cadet Costume

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space cadet cosplay
Meet George Jetson,
His Boy Elroy,
Daughter Judy,
Jane, His wife.

Hold up a damn minute! Judy has grown up! Damn girl, I got a rocket in my pocket and you got a ticket to ride. Can you tilt that satellite dish a little to the left? I’m trying to tune the big game in. You so crazy. You were poking out eyes with those pointy boobs that hypnotize long before Madonna. So how have you been? I see from the image below that Mr. Spacely gave you a job holding up pillars. So where have you been? Oh, I see. Judging by those passport tattoos stamped all over, you get around girl. Catch ya on the flip side.
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Burrito Baby Blanket

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baby burrito blanket
Hey, is that the baby from teletubbies? I have no idea. Babies all look alike to me. Which is probably why we have taken to wrapping our babies in faux-food items like this Burrito Baby Blanket. Don’t blame me if I’m next to you at Taco Bell and you order yourself a Gordita, while leaving your big burrito unattended. If I see a giant burrito, I’m eating it!

Not even gonna pay attention to the crying, because it wouldn’t be the first time that my food has cried and whimpered as I bite down into it. You are just asking for trouble with this delicious looking blanket. Just bad parenting if you ask me.*burps* And now if you’ll excuse me, I have to make a run to the border.

Get Clean Lickety Split With Tongue Soap

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tongue soap
Dogs do it. Cats do it. You should too. I’m not talking about licking your own butt while you stick your leg in the air like some carnival freak. I am talking about cleaning yourself. With your tongue. Your soap tongue. This Human Tongue Soap will get you clean, but may leave you feeling dirty.

It’s perfect for bathing with your partner. Hey, can you tongue under my arms? I have some serious BO. Also, my butt is really dirty today. It needs some extra tongue. Yeah right there. That’s a little tongue in cheek humor, right there.

You can also get the “With Teeth” soap dish shown to go with it if you want to be really weird.

Zombie Bride Bustier: Nice Brains

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zombie bustier
The undead bride-to-be is going to look lovely in this Zombie Bride Bustier. I didn’t know that zombies took brides, but looking at the brains on this one, I can see why they might. You don’t get brains like that unless you study hard and stay in school. Well, I guess a zombie plastic surgeon could augment what you have and give you a bigger brain-cup though. Anywho, you will be the “Walking Down The Aisle” Dead in this outfit.

Dead, undead, alive, it’s all the same. Within a year she will be yelling at you to clean up the dishes and complaining that you don’t bring her fresh brains anymore.
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Spooky Colored Skull Candles

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http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/colored-skull-candles
These colored skull candles will add an eerie otherworldly atmosphere to your home. Things will get even scarier as they begin to melt away. They are perfect for Halloween or just creating a spooky ambiance any other day of the year.

Me? Usually when I want to create a scary atmosphere I just turn out the lights completely and then turn them on again when the cockroaches come out.

Instant terror, but I love the adrenaline rush that hits me just before I run outside and make a man-shaped hole in my screen door. I should probably call the exterminator since these things have started making Predator noises.