So… That happened. The Human Centipede Ginger Bread Man wants to be your new favorite holiday decor. Looks like they have a good ginger bread train going there. All aboard! Choo choo! If you’re gonna do the whole human centipede thing, I guess being a ginger bread man is the way to go. That way, all you taste is ginger bread, instead of you know, butt. I love that guy’s face in front. He’s all like, “Holy shizz! I did not see my day going like this!”
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Tag: home decor
Body Wrapped In Bag Christmas Ornament
Wow. That’ll get Santa’s attention and make him soil his jolly old pants. This Body Wrapped In Bag Christmas Ornament is sure to make the big guy recheck his nice and naughty list. He may even start a new list and call it “Serial Killer. Do not visit next year. Call the police!” If you are looking to decorate a darker tree this year, this ornament is perfect. Hey, at least it isn’t floating down a river somewhere.
Yeah this will compliment all of those newspaper clippings you have on your wall, with the scribbled red writing and Xs over people’s faces. Damn son, your stockings are hung on the chimney with terror!
These Cool Monster Mugs Will Bite Your Face Off
Etsy seller MonsterMug isn’t called that because of their acne problem or cuz they are just plain ugly. They may be horrendous. Don’t know, never met them. I’ve heard stories though. But they go by that name cuz they make awesome and scary monster mugs. Kinda like that lady cashier I always run into at the Quicky Mart, except those are monster jugs. Really, nothing at all like that, except that it rhymes.
These mugs are fun and playful, but scary and they look like they want to bite your face off. One question: If I’m drinking out of a monster mouth? Are we swapping spit?
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Addam’s Family Candle Set
They’re creepy and they’re kooky, mysterious and spooky. They’re all together ooky. Uncle Fester took a dookie. The Addams Family…. Holy Morticia, this is a cool Addam’s Family Candle Set. The candle light shows through the images, making them look all extra scary. What kind of a name is Wednesday Addams anyway? Who names their kid after a day of the week? I guess it’s better than calling your kid “hump day”. These candles are going to look awesome in your home. Especially if your shelves are like mine and full of cobwebs cuz you don’t clean. My houses is haunted. By laziness.
Ouija Board Cutting Board
If I cut cheese on this Ouija Board Cutting Board, does that make it a Cheeja cutting board? Is that a cheesy joke? Anyhow, if you cut the cheese on a ouija board, it upsets the spirits. Boy did I learn that the hard way during a seance. Yeah, I woke the dead alright. The medium was gagging through a handkerchief, people passing out, the planchette just freaking out, whirling around the board and highlighting NO over and over and GOODBYE, like it wanted to commit suicide. I was the last one standing and I wasn’t invited back.
But enough about me. How have you been? It’s been so long. I feel like we never talk. K bye!