Cthulhu Bobblehead

cthulu
What’s green, looks scary as hell and bounces around on your desk? No, not that booger I just flicked. well, okay that too, but I’m talking about this cool Cthulhu Bobblehead from Etsy seller stexe. We’ve featured his work before. He makes some pretty cool stuff, like these Burning Man candles.

This thing is no good for my OCD. Make the head bobble and roll a D10 for a Sanity check. Make the head bobble and roll a D10 for a Sanity check. Make the head bobble and roll a D10 for a Sanity check. There goes my whole day.
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Skull Shaped Sugar Spoon

sugar skull
This skull shaped sugar spoon lets you pile heaping mounds of sugar aka white death onto your spoon so that it looks like the poison it is.

The hell? Did I just say that? Yeah, I’ve been putting the moves on this healthy chick, so I have to practice and pretend I’m not a fat slob. It’s gonna work out great right up until I invite her over for Mac and Cheese with a bacon appetizer.

Totally getting this spoon though. Mounds of skull sugar are the best. It’s like having a sugary grim reaper bringing you one step closer to his embrace, a spoonful at a time.
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Five Finger Fillet Pen Holder With Custom Pens

finger fillet pen holder
I used to be the king of Five Finger Fillet back in the days when I had five fingers. Scratch that! I’m still the king baby! You don’t have to worry about slicing fingers that aren’t there. All hail the king minions! Give me five! I mean slap me two. Spot me one! Played again and now there’s none!

Imma get this Five Finger Fillet Pen Holder so I can relive the glory days of spurting blood and screaming like a baby. It comes with it’s own custom pens and basically looks like a liquid metal Terminator hand stabbing itself.

Moby Whisk: Whisk It With A Whale Tail

moby whisk
When some batter comes along, you must whisk it. Now whisk it. Whisk it good. With a whale tail. Whale hello! This mixing whisk has a whale tail. Thankfully, not the kind you see at Walmart. For those you would need a much bigger bowl. It is taking the kitchens of animal lovers everywhere by storm and goes perfectly with the Loch Ness Monster Ladle.

Have a whale of a good time while whipping up some food for the family. It’s really over-whale-ming.
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Main Drain Turns Your Toilet Into A Urinal

main drain urinal
The Main Drain is for people like me who come home drunk and pee against the wall thinking they’re still at the bar and hosing down a urinal. Clean up is a real pain and slipping on pee can lead to serious injuries. The solution is not to stop drinking, but to turn your toilet into a urinal.

That’s what the Main Drain is all about. Just put your main vein in front of the Main Drain and drunken peeing will no longer be a pain. It attaches to the side of your toilet. One question. If I’m too drunk to hit what I’m aiming at already, what makes you think I won’t drop a deuce in this thing, thinking I’m using a fancy space toilet? Does it have a warranty is what I’m asking.
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