UFO Art Pottery – The Truth Is Out There

UFO Art Pottery
Man, there’s just not enough alien/UFO art pottery. Thank Xenu that CommonGroundPottery is making weird and cool UFO stuff for your home. They look like stuff that an archaeologist dug up, while proving that we have been visited before. In fact, I dare somebody to prove that we have not been visited before. I’ve been visited by the cable guy, a UPS driver, a Jehovah’s Witness, and some kid selling candy bars for his school. And that was just this week. So yeah! Case proven!

I love the saucer shaped pieces that show the pilots in the cockpit. *Giggles* I said cockpit. If you have two aliens in a cockpit, I guess you know what that makes them. Two c**ks in a cockpit. Why do you think they call it that? That’s where c**ks go. Just being honest. I hope they don’t have a sword fight in there. I’m concerned cuz it’s a small area,with delicate equipment.
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Tortured Eyes iPhone 6 Plus / iPhone 6s Plus Case

Tortured Eyes iPhone 6 Plus  iPhone 6s Plus Case
Looking for a case for your iPhone 6 Plus or iPhone 6s Plus? Well, you found it and it’s looking at you too. Your iPhone is now an eyePhone. The Tortured Eyes iPhone 6 Plus / iPhone 6s Plus Case is a real eye opener. They’ll watch you, you’ll watch them, before you know it you’ll have a crazy staring contest. The winner gets your soul. It won’t be you cuz it’s impossible to win a staring contest against that many eyes. You have to study for years and be a good pupil to win a contest like that.

Enjoy your many adventures with this case. Whatever you do, don’t answer the phone until you see the whites of their eyes.
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Eraserhead Baby Cake

Eraserhead Baby Cake
Remember that Eraserhead Baby Figure? Yeah, somebody made a cake. Debbiedoescakes made this abomination. I wonder what it tasted like. Does it erase your taste buds? I’m kind of sad I didn’t get a slice. It was probably made for some freaky wedding or something. If that’s the case, you might say that this is the David Lynch-pin in their relationship.

Maybe it was made for a baby shower for a real ugly baby. If I had an eraserhead, I’d be writing in pencil and correcting all kinds of grammar. C’mere you little freak! *Rubs his head against the paper until there’s nothing but a nub left.*

via Dangerous Minds

Dark Shadows Gargoyle Sculptural Lamp

Dark Shadows Gargoyle Sculptural Lamp
Damn, this gargoyle is all like, “Waz up? I have arrived and I’m about to move my wings like a trench coat and flash you.” Enjoy the ethereal light that seems to emminate from his ghostly gargoyle crotch. This Dark Shadows Gargoyle Sculptural Lamp is half evil, half… I don’t know what. I just know I don’t want to see his demon weenie, but he seems to be threatening to show it. Is that a light in your loafers or are you just happy to see me? Both? Cool. This lamp will cast some neat light onto your wall, I just hope it doesn’t cast a shadow shaped like his demonic junk.

Gargamel the gargoyle got gassy and gargled garlic in the great gazebo with Gonzo the ghost guest. I just had to type that. No reason. Glad I got that out of my system. Now my brain will have room for other more important stuff. Despite his glowing nether regions on this lamp, it’s a pretty cool piece of interior frighting. You guy readers should get one. Because every Gar-boy needs a Gar-goyle! I totally nailed that one! Usually I just staple gun it. Or even thumb tack it.

Black Octopus Victorian Style Pocket Watch Necklace

Black Octopus Victorian Style Pocket Watch
It’s always tentacle time when you wear this Black Octopus Victorian Style Pocket Watch Necklace around your neck. Is it ten-tacle past five yet? I have an important appointment. Funny behind the scenes fact: At first I typed “I have an impotent appointment.” But that isn’t true. I can assure you that everything is working fine here. I repeat I AM NOT seeing a wiener doctor because my Ballpark frank is stuck in cocktail weenie mode. Glad we could clear that up.

So anyway, this is a sweet ass pocket watch with an octopus. That you can wear around your neck. Pry open those tentacles and you get to see the time even. We live in an amazing time. I mean, hell, doctors these days can cure anything- No, I didn’t mean- Trust me, I’m all good down there. But if I wasn’t, it would only happen that one time. Perfectly normal!
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