Tag: odd

My Critter Catcher

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

critter catcher
ACK! Get it out! Take it outside! No, I can’t do it, I’m too busy standing on the couch screaming! Does that sound like you? Hey, me too. I don’t judge. That’s why I’m getting My Critter Catcher. So I can catch these critters and feel brave. It works by trapping their many legs. I’ll probably feel much calmer catching spiders with this thing and only scream a warrior’s scream. My warrior’s scream just happens to sound like a little girl.

Check out a video below to see spiders get what’s coming to them!
Read more “My Critter Catcher”

Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece
You know when you are walking outside and you get a spiderweb in your hair? So you scream and try to get it off and you end up on your hands and knees crying? This Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece is like that. Only on purpose.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive… Yeah, but practice makes perfect. And I’ve practiced smacking myself all over the head every time I get a spiderweb in my hair. I can no longer remember people’s names, but I’m pretty sure I’m spider-free.

Extra Terrestrial Alien UFO Wine Bottle Holder

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Extra Terrestrial Alien UFO Wine Bottle Holder
Apparently the drinking age on Alpha Centauri is like 2 years old. I know an alien baby when I see one. This guy is probably like 10 months old and they didn’t bother to card him. Now he’s all laying on the bar, kicking at the bottle as he chugs it all down. Dreaming of the day when he’s old enough to fly his own UFO under the influence.

FYI: This Alien Wine bottle holder looks scary as hell without a bottle in it’s mouth. Click the link to check it out.

Book Of The Dead Necronomicon iPhone Case

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Book Of The Dead Necronomicon iPhone Case
This Book Of The Dead Necronomicon iPhone Case lets the book of the dead protect your iPhone. From being dead. It’s compatible with the iPhone 4/4S , iPhone 5/5S, and iPhone 6. Screams of torment sold separately. Book of the dead. Pfft! You get old enough and your high school yearbook starts turning into that.

Damn that face looks cranky. Maybe he’s hungry. Somebody give that thing some lunch. Maybe someone should check it’s diaper, cuz a certain iPhone case looks like Mr. Grumpy pants.
Read more “Book Of The Dead Necronomicon iPhone Case”

Custom Zombie Cat Figurines

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Custom Zombie Cat Figurines
Wanna turn your fluffy Miss Mittens into a crazy deadly zombie? Well, now you can. These Custom Zombie Cat Figurines will take your fluffy little fuzz-nugget and turn them into rotting undead pus-nuggets. They will make your cat look like he or she just crawled out of the grave and are ready to eat you. Yeah, they don’t look friendly at all. Like they just came back from Stephen King’s pet sematary. Yeah, count me out of that petting session.

Sure, you’re happy to see Mr. Nibbles-worth again. How’ve ya been? I’m so happy you’re back. I missed my sweet wittle puss-puss. So you grab for a can of tuna, but he grabs for your throat. You’re dying on the floor, he’s nipping at your intestines. It’s bad. Bad scene man. That’s why when I bury a pet, I fill that hole up with concrete. If I ever see a block of concrete with a tail slowly lumbering my way, I have time to get the shotgun.
Custom Zombie Cat Figurines