Tag: odd

Count Chunkula Mask

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Count Chunkula Mask
This Count Chunkula Mask shows you what happens when you eat wayyyy too much Count Chocula Cereal. Which I could have already told you by looking in the mirror. I had a box a day habit and went through all of the stages: Count Pudge-ula, Count Huskie-ula and finally I hit Count Chunkula.

I crave blood, but keep eating cereal. Also I can turn into a bat. A fat non-flying bat who gets out of breath lifting his wings. It was all worth it though. Have you tasted those cereals? They’re like crack. I should have gone with Boo-Berry!
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Skeleton Hands Bra

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Skeleton Hands Bra
Man, I love this skeleton hands bra. What? No, not for myself. Girls just look so sexy when old and decrepit bones are holding up their fun bags. Ask any gold-digger. Too bad I don’t know someone who bought this, cuz I would totally paint my hands all black with realistic bones and just cup them stealthily from behind until I got caught and eventually incarcerated. Now do you see why I don’t have anyone of the fairer sex in my life? It’s cuz I’m a real class act! True that!

Fairer sex! Pfft! If they’re so fair, why don’t any of them give me a chance?

Enjoy The Probing Alien Coffee Mug

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Enjoy The Probing Alien Coffee Mug
*Looks at the Enjoy The Probing Alien Coffee Mug. Shrugs.* Okay, fine. I will. I’ll try to enjoy it. Actually, it’s pretty uncomfortable. I’ll enjoy the mug for sure. The coffee will be enjoyable. No guarantees about the probing.

Hey, if you had any idea how much it hurts, you would know that it’s gonna take a lot more than a funny mug to cheer me up after. You try letting a spaceman ram his rocket into a crater on Uranus and see how you feel. Maybe YOU should enjoy the probing. How about this? If you enjoy it, I’ll enjoy it. Deal? K. No take backs.

Buddha Cthulhu

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Buddha Cthulhu
Meditate on this! Buddha Cthulhu offers not enlightenment, but insanity. Buddha Cthulhu just laughs at you. Telepathically. You are beneath him. He cares not for your Earthly vessel and your Earthly problems. He just wants to sit and chill. So why are you bothering him. F**k off! Give BC some space and get out of his tentacled face. What does an ancient evil have to do to get some peace and quiet?

Put this guy on your desk and bask in his awesomeness.
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Milk Packaging Shows Cow Getting Abducted By UFO

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Milk Packaging Shows Cow Getting Abducted By UFO
We all know that humans and cows are being abducted by aliens. It’s no secret. That’s why they are now putting UFOs abducting cows on milk bottles. This cool concept design for Molocow milk makes every serving of milk a recreation of a terrifying cow abduction. They say it’s fun for kids. I say it is terrifying for cows. I do like the cool flying saucer bottle caps though.

It’s all fun and games until that beam of light hits you and lifts you up into the mothership and violates your privates, whether you are a cow or a human. I hope they actually put this on their bottle though. I’m sure they will milk the idea for all it’s worth. If you think UFOs are utter nonsense, think again.
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