Category: Geeky Cool Stuff

Mounted Taxidermy Dragon Head

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taxidermy dragon head
What? This awesome Mounted Taxidermy Dragon Head costs $1,499.? Like Stevie Nicks said, “Stop dragon my heart around!” Puff the magic dragon may have lived by the sea, but he died by my hand. At least, that’s what I’m gonna tell people when they see this sweet head mounted on my wall.

Did you really kill that thing?

Yep. Killed it with kindness.

Huh?

*Shows off my caveman club with the word “kindness” carved in the handle.* Yeah, he was all like, “I can see you have a kindness. Jump on my back and we shall be friends, adventuring to far off lands.” I just climbed up and whacked him real good until my arm was tired. Good thing I’m good at whacking things.

Cthulhu Candle

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cthulhu candle
Whether trying to get through a power outage or just setting up a candlelit dinner for two, live by the light of Cthulhu with this Cthulhu Candle. If he scares you, don’t worry. You get to watch his tentacled evil mass burn.

This hefty Cthulhu candle weighs about 1 pound and stands about 4 1/2 inches tall. He also has an’afterlife’ scent. Wait. Does that mean only he can smell it when he’s all burned down and dead? I have no idea. I thought he would smell more like burnt octopus.

The HeadBlade: A Car Head Shaver That Is Fast And Furious

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headblade shaverThe Headblade shaver is basically a razor with a little matchbox car attached. Vroom. Vroom. Ride and groom. It lets those bald tough guy types shave their heads super fast and super furious! Well, this one looks like an ATV, which I guess is fine, because it is going off road and onto bald mountain.

Maybe buy two. That way you and a buddy can get some racing action going on another friend’s head. Put some Nintendo figures on these and you can call it Super Mario Shavers. “Why does my head feel all bloody guys?” That’s not blood. It’s red mud. These tires really tear up the track. Quit your crying and keep still. I’m almost caught up to Luigi.
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Gigantic Alien Monster Sound System

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alien monster sound system
This Gigantic Alien Monster Sound System has landed on Earth to rock you like a hurricane. Gather around and prepare to be blown away by it’s gigantic speakers. Then prepare to be disappointed, because all he wants to play is coldplay. Hey, that’s some heavy teenage rage shizz where he comes from. It’s not his fault your ears are on your head instead of on your butt-flaps like a normal sentient creature.

This awesome Alien Monster Sound System will cost you $22,706.63 The 63 cents is an awesome tax. Mandatory for something this friggin’ righteous. I’m gonna stand right up in front of him and proclaim that I am ready to rock! Then when the first sound hits the speakers I’m gonna be thrown like 500 feet. Again! Again!
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Dinosaur Toothbrush Holders

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dinosaur toothbrush holder
My parents used to say, “Brush your teeth, or you’ll go extinct like the dinosaurs!” My grandparents used to say, “Bwush or teef or ul gah estint lit da vinotars.” My grandparents had no teeth. And were dinosaurs. So they knew what they were talking about.

Brush your teeth kids. Like boobs and testes, you only get one set. And these Dinosaur Toothbrush Holders from Etsy seller SnarlingBunny(Stop snarling at me! Why are you foaming at the mouth? Great, I have rabies now!) make brushing fun.
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