Tag: awesome

Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles

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Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles
Bring the terror of the deep to your desk or coffee table with these cool Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles. It came from the deep and now you are in the deep. Caca that is. This 6 piece sculpture consists of 3 different sized tentacles and accompanying wave breaks. They look downright terrifying.

I’ll put them on my table, but if it reaches for my potato chips, I’m laying the smack down. It better not get all touchy feely on me when I’m watching TV. Just cuz you’re made of felt doesn’t mean I’m gonna get felt up. Behave.

Life Size UFO: Take Me To Your Leader

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Life Size UFO Take Me To Your Leader
Hello Earthling. This is my life size UFO, which is totally rad and stuff. Don’t touch the paint. Take me to your leader. I really need to do a number 3. Better call a hazmat team. I had space chili earlier. You know what they say about space chili. It scratches that itch, but the ride home’s a biatch.

You gonna take me to your leader or what? I just Blarted in my space suit! You don’t know what that means, but trust me on this one, back up like 20 feet and don’t approach the impending crater for 24 hours.
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Dinosaur Fossil Coasters

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Dinosaur Fossil Coasters
People often say to me, “Shut up you old fossil” or “Who dug up that old fossil?” By people, I mean kids. I usually just shake my fist and mutter. Like it’s my fault that male pattern baldness and lady hips magically appeared on my 18th birthday. I’m from the GMO generation. My endocrines disrupted like it was a party up in here and it’s ladies night! Oh what a night! 30 is the new “Holy f**k it’s coffin buying time.” I got the cheapest option with the brass handles BTW. Just in case you want to know.

Anyway, these dinosaur fossil coasters are friggin’ awesome. No bones about it. If I wasn’t already using fast food napkins, I’d be on these in a heartbeat. These is classy. Enjoy them before you’re 30.
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Time Machines: I’m Going Back To The Future

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Time Machines I'm Going Back To The Future
Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads. But that’s just cuz I like to drive on the dirt side of the road. I think of myself as a ditch finder. I hit it so you don’t have to. I do it for the community. In fact, the local cops used to call me the Deuce of Hazard cuz it never looks cool and is always lame. When I found out what that meant, I laughed. Then cried. I’ll show them all when I buy one of Harveygallery’s time machines.

First I’m going back to 1984 when I was 4 pants sizes smaller. Gonna warn myself about the dangers of overeating so it changes the “Now Me” into a thin dude. Then the “Now Me” is gonna pig out and I won’t gain any weight cuz that 1984 sucker did all the work already. I’m gonna chill and enjoy being one of the “not fat” people for awhile, then zip off to the future where I find “Jabba the me” has finally porked out. Then I’m just gonna give up and we can pig out together and shoot the crap. Time machines are sweet!
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Legends of Cthulhu Necronomicon Collector Set

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Legends of Cthulhu Necronomicon Collector Set
This Legends of Cthulhu Necronomicon Collector Set is truly legendary. Not legend-dairy, cuz that just means some kind of cow superhero. I think. Anyway, if you like Cthulhu, you’ll love this set. *Blogging like a DJ today in my shiny jacket and headphones, going all Wricka-Wricka and Erra Erra, puttin’ a match to my scratch and blown’ shizz up* Put your tentacles in the air like ya just don’t care and give it up for my main man Cthulhu and check check check this Necronomicon Box!

Like eldritch horrors? Well, inside of this box you’ll find a Welcome Letter from the Professor and the ‘Society of Cthulhu Investigators,’ a coloring book, an official ‘SCI’ Cthulhu ring, die-cut stickers, Cthulhu patch, and folded poster. Awesome.
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