Tag: cooking

Skeleton Molds For Making Creepy Candy

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Skeleton Molds For Making Creepy Candy
If you want some scary candy, you can make skeleton parts with these Skeleton Molds. Make yourself a skull-sucker, some sour ribs, whatever you want. You can get parts for the upper body and the lower body. I’m gonna make an entire chocolate skeleton. Do you dare me to eat the whole thing? Do you double-dog dare me? Triple-dog dare me? Where the hell did you get so many dogs?

Okay, you had me with the original dare. When it comes to eating chocolate I am in fact Daredevil. Cuz I’m all over Netflix while I chomp away and it looks like Hell’s Kitchen up in here.
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Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween
I love cookies. I’m a real cookie monster and not just because I have blue fur and googly eyes. I just love ’em. So maybe I can get my wife to buy these Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween from AlgisCrafts. Even if the wife doesn’t bake any cookies, it will make a nice change of pace having all of my bruises in fun shapes like skulls, bats and spiders.

They have all kinds of rolling pins. Personally I think they look like they might really hurt. I’m not so hungry for cookies anymore.
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Deep Sea Critter Lid Lifters

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deep sea critter lid lifter
These Deep Sea Critter Lid Lifters are cool. You know what sea creatures hate? Pots that boil over. I know from personal experience because my wife is a raging sea hag and she can’t even cook a bowl of noodles. *dodges a bowl of flying boiling water* You missed me bi-

Update: Typing this from the library now because boiling water and blogging do not mix. Been picking boiled pasta from my keyboard for 2 hours. I’ll be headed to a Best Buy right after, so I can get screwed on a new laptop and no, if it doesn’t cover a rampaging wife from hell, I don’t want your warranty!

Anyway, where was I? Yeah, so these lid lifters look like sea creatures escaping from your boiling pot. That’s what all the food looks like in my house. Like me, everything just wants to escape her clutches. Looks like it’s going to be another night dining at Chez Kit-Kat with a side of Burger King. I better call Cthulhu and see if she simmered down before I head home. Also gonna get a waterproof case for my new laptop.

Cthulhu Spoon Set

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cthulhu spoonDinner with Cthulhu is too dangerous, no matter how much of a fan you are. So, instead of dining with the ancient terror himself, use these Cthulhu spoons with your meal. They are much safer. But NEVER spoon with Cthulhu. Trust me on that one. The guy is all grabby x 8. Long story. It involves a rave, an out of work magician with a chicken and a bar on the east coast. Oh and a roofie in each tentacle.
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