Incredible Melting Mandles. Man + Candles = Mandles. These candles are like little zombies that you can watch melt to the ground in three hours. Light him up, watch his last hours on this Earth. Only $15. from Etsy seller Stexe.
Click through for more pictures and an awesome rock solid video demo of these mandles. You’ll want to get yourself a little trash bin to go with these guys.
Read more “The Real Burning Man: Incredible Melting Man Candles…Mandles”
Yabba Dabba Doooooo! You and your family can be a Neanderthal family this Halloween. Etsy seller Becozy has everything you need for just $65. She is even offering to throw in some scraps of loincloth to cover your baby carrier or stroller.
Nah. I prefer to cloth my family in the skin of my own kills. Which is probably why we all walk around half naked. Animals are just too fast and I’m too flabby. They always seem to hear the old Walmart scooter coming. I eventually lose my prey after stalking it through one aisle and then I get all out of breath from hitting the brake lever. That’s what I call a full day. Oh wait. That’s shopping. Not hunting and gathering.
I lied. I’m not part of the Walmart biker gang, “Hell’s (very large and slow) Angels”, but if I keep eating cheetos and playing video games I’ll get there eventually.
X-Ray vision. All of the cool superheroes are doing it. Sadly, we mere humans don’t possess the ability. Believe me, I’ve tried. The X-Ray specs in the back of the old comic books don’t work. They just get you punched in the face by angry females.
If you want to feel like you have crazy awesome powers while playing a game of poker, try these awesome X-Ray Playing Cards. You can see through them, but your opponents can’t see what cards you have. They must be made with some kind of X-Ray voodoo magic.
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Experience the horror of a spoon that does not allow you to eat soup. These Friday The 13th Jason mask spoons will be great for those on a diet since half of your food will be gone by the time it gets to your mouth. Etsy seller BlackDeath777 is selling these for $37.
Display them year round and use them every Friday The 13th. They are to die for.
Read more “No Soup For You: Friday The 13th Jason Hockey Mask Spoons”
This Ghostbusters Slimer Headpiece Mask lets you play the role of slimer this Halloween. I would wear a black robe to hide my body, so it looks like slimer is floating through the night. Then when Bill Murray or Dan Akroyd or, well anybody, gets close…I’m gonna spit on them. You’ve been slimed fool.
Dude that’s nasty! How’d you get the slime all green and gooey so that it sticks to people’s faces?
That was the easy part. I drank lots of mountain dew and I’ve been chewing on nothing but green gummi bears. Been saving that in my cheek all night like a chipmunk.