Tag: housewares

Bookends That Attack

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bookends
You can’t have books without having some bookends to keep them all organized. Unless you are me and you use canned vegetables, because you’re cheap. What else am I gonna do, eat ’em? Anyway, if I eat that can of corn, my entire Game of Thrones book series is going to fall. Not that I read it. TV made it so I don’t have to read it. Anyway, did you know those books are like 500 pages? And they don’t even have a single picture of a dragon inside?

Anyway these awesome bookends from KnobCreekMetalArts all feature various attacks, with your books caught in the middle. Everything from tentacles attacking pirate ships, to dinosaurs trying to eat people, to aliens abducting people. Who needs to read the books when the bookends are so exciting?

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Trapeze Family Clothes Pins: The Amazing Pegzini Family

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trapeze family clothes pins
Now you can be part of a heart-pounding show every time you dry your clothes. You will marvel at the death defying antics. You will be astounded by the acrobatics. You will be- Pretty damn tired from doing laundry all day. But at least you can enjoy these fun trapeze family clothing pins on your clothes line.

These guys are good. Normally I just paint happy faces on my plain wooden clothes pins, but it’s a sausage-fest cuz they are all men. You can’t draw boobs on narrow clothes pins.

Anyway, sorry Pegzini family, your career is all downhill on my clothesline. No really. My size 50 jeans alone really make it sag. Once you were acrobats, now you are just downhill racers.
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David Bowie Hanging Mobile: For Bowie Babies

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david bowie mobile
It’s never too early to introduce your baby to the genius that is David Bowie. The best way to do so is with this David Bowie Hanging Mobile. You and your baby can be heroes. Just for one day.

If you bought the photo of David Bowie getting arrested, you could hang that up in the nursery too. Your kid will be listening to Ziggy Stardust in no time and will grow up to become a real Space Oddity.
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Skull Shaped Sugar Spoon

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sugar skull
This skull shaped sugar spoon lets you pile heaping mounds of sugar aka white death onto your spoon so that it looks like the poison it is.

The hell? Did I just say that? Yeah, I’ve been putting the moves on this healthy chick, so I have to practice and pretend I’m not a fat slob. It’s gonna work out great right up until I invite her over for Mac and Cheese with a bacon appetizer.

Totally getting this spoon though. Mounds of skull sugar are the best. It’s like having a sugary grim reaper bringing you one step closer to his embrace, a spoonful at a time.
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Moby Whisk: Whisk It With A Whale Tail

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moby whisk
When some batter comes along, you must whisk it. Now whisk it. Whisk it good. With a whale tail. Whale hello! This mixing whisk has a whale tail. Thankfully, not the kind you see at Walmart. For those you would need a much bigger bowl. It is taking the kitchens of animal lovers everywhere by storm and goes perfectly with the Loch Ness Monster Ladle.

Have a whale of a good time while whipping up some food for the family. It’s really over-whale-ming.
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