Tag: strange

Skulls And Ravens Bookends

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Skulls And Ravens Bookends
Oh my stars and garters! (Whatever that means.) Oh my skulls and ravens. These Skulls And Ravens Bookends are creeptastic and awesome. It’s a well known fact that ravens like to perch on skulls. I can’t even walk to my car without a raven landing on my head, but then it leaves because I have too much skin and hair and stuff. It sits on a tree branch somewhere just waiting and watching. Waiting for my demise so that it can perch on my bare skull.

This is why I run to my car and never ever look up.

Succusaurus Cacteye Dinosaurs

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Succusaurus Cacteye Dinosaurs
Love these Succusaurus Cacteye Dinosaurs. I just love to say it. You suck! Yeah? Well you succusaurus! You’re a Succusaurus rex! They are a safe place for all of your succulents, but they also create a new dinosaur species. I was trying to figure out what else to say, but I can’t find the right words. Better consult my Thesucusaurus. I mean thesaurus.

It’s like dinosaurs were attacked by plants. From the inside! This is why I don’t eat salads people.
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Octopus Toilet Paper Holder

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Octopus Toilet Paper Holder
The Octopus Toilet Paper Holder is like having extra tentacles for your TP. The only problem is that this guy won’t ever stop staring at you while you are taking an octo-dump. That’s an 8 minute dump for those who don’t know. Could also be used for a massive dump of 8 curvy logs that look like floating tentacles. Not that I would know. I don’t look at my poop after it leaves me. I’m not one for long and drawn out goodbyes.

Twisted Trivia – The Serial Killer Trivia Board Game

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Twisted Trivia - The Serial Killer Trivia Board Game
The Serial Killer Trivia Board Game sounds like a real fun time and all, but all I know about these wack-jobs is to stay the hell away from them. Have you heard about the Board Game Killer? He gets people to play this game with him and if they don’t know jack about serial killers, they ain’t leaving alive. He’ll carve your bones into dice man. So I’m out. Imma stick to Yahtzee and Monopoly.
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Full Body Pregnant Skeleton Iron On Halloween Costume

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Full Body Pregnant Skeleton Iron On Halloween Costume
This Full Body Pregnant Skeleton Iron On Halloween Costume reminds me of that time at the airport, when I was traveling with my girlfriend. She got the full body X-ray revealing that she was with child and proceeded to her gate to board the plan. I waved and proceeded to the car and went home. Enjoy Hawaii for two honey.

I kid. I kid. I would never leave a woman so suddenly like that. I texted goodbye first.