Tag: unique

Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs

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Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs
MakingFacesPottery not only makes weird faces while making pottery, they also occasionally make fugly face mugs, like I did in grade school. Their’s are much better. These Zombie and Ugly Face Mugs have faces that only a mother can love. A mother hopped up on acid, who sticks her head in the oven after getting a good look at the kid! The shop has freaky creatures, zombies, fugly things that defy naming and other monstrosity mugs that will scare the black off your coffee and make the sugar jump from your tea.

*Random audience reaction.* That’s not politically correct! You should be nicer!

*Looks at dude’s avatar.* You should be on a mug. Burn! That’s why ya don’t mess with me. You ugly. You ugly. Yo mama says you ugly!

I don’t have an avatar!

Hmmm. Um. The burn is on me then. That was actually my reflection. U-G-L-Y, I’m the one with no alibi. You have won this round sir! But ugly never gives up, so I will be back and uglier than ever. Right now I have to see someone about marketing a mug in my image. Actually I think that second image really captures my twisted and freakish essence. Almost.
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Mummy Leggings

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Mummy Leggings
Should you buy these Mummy Leggings? I bet you’re torn. They shred the competition’s mummy leggings to pieces. Just because they are distressed, that doesn’t mean you have to be. It’s an easy choice. You either want to look like an ancient and sexy mummy or you don’t.

Worried about an ancient curse? I’m pretty sure they’re cursed, but in a good way. By you! Cursed like, you’re gonna put ’em on and be all like, “Holy f**k I look f***n’ fine!” Your daddy’s gonna be all like, “C’mere mummy. Give daddy some sugar.”

Vampire Repellent Necklace

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Vampire Repellent Necklace
Vampires hate garlic. That’s why I eat garlic bread every night of the week. Saved my life many times. Like that night I saw a shadowy figure and I hissed like a wild cat, spreading my garlic venom through the air toward him. Naturally, he retreated at the same time I continued on my way. That time it was just a reflection of myself in the store window, but still. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bites to the neck. This Vampire Repellent Necklace will help too.

Vampires hate garlic and they hate garlic clove pendants. They won’t mess with garlic in any form. That’s why you never see any Italian Vampire chefs.

Pro tip: Always watch who’s buying the garlic products at the grocery store. That’ll tell ya who isn’t a bloodsucker. Anyone that does not buy garlic definitely needs to be followed home and staked. By a professional of course. Don’t try that at home.

Mirror Framed By Fingers

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Mirror Framed By Fingers
Um, Okay… This is a Mirror Framed By Fingers. For reals. It has fingers all around it. Looking in this mirror is gonna be a white-knuckle ride baby. Are they all middle fingers? I have no idea, but I’m flipping this thing off like a hundred times, just so we’re even.

Fingers, fingers, on the wall, who’s got the fairest fingers of them all? I do. Mine are the fairest. You just have the most. I would count how many you have, but I don’t have enough fingers to count that high. I might just get this, cuz the mirror I currently have is all thumbs… Not fingers.

Spooky Apothecary Jars

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Spooky Apothecary Jars
Hey, check out these cool Spooky Apothecary Jars. Are you listening? Do you even apothe-CARE-y? I know ya do. Just funning with ya. Which is similar to joshing you, but with no Josh required. These scary looking jars are going to look great on your shelves if they are as full of cobwebs as mine are.

There’s Vampire Juice, Witches Brew and Spider Poison. Among others.

I’ll Use the Witches brew to lure a Vampire, then make him drink the V juice, (That’s not dirty. Just sounds dirty) and have him administer the spider poison, so I can clean up all of those cobwebs! Why are they called cobwebs anyway? I never see them on corn cobs.