Who needs VR when you are playing with this Great Horror Movie Villains Paper Dolls Book and you start getting paper cuts cuz Freddy and his buddies are slashing at you. Shizz just got real. Oh yeah Freddy? How about I put your doll in the fireplace? Or get a paper dollhouse and make you roomates with that chick from the Misery movie? How you like that? Ow! You little- That’s it! No more paper dolls for me. I’m locking you all up together so you can kill each other. Once the feeling returns to my hands!
Category: Creepy Dolls
Toys For Little Creepers – Plush Skeleton Dolls
I can’t decide if these Plush Skeleton Dolls are cute or creepy, but that one guy in the back with no face… Nightmare fuel! Look at them. Just one big happy family with momma skeleton holding them all on a rocker. They’re tight too. Nobody makes fun of no-face or calls him names like Void or Spaceface, but you can tell that even they are creeped out by him. Did you know that plush skeletons grow up to become all rigid and bony, losing all of their plushy flesh by 12 years old? True story.
Do you think that pumpkin stole that kids face? Damn. Now I’m more weirded out by the pumpkin. Probably took his soul too. Yeah, that pumpkin is the real power behind the throne. There’s some messed up stuff going on here.
The Creature From The Black Lagoon Super Size Action Figure
Super size me! What- Not french fries and a Coke, but I’ll take those too. I’m talkin’ a super sized monster for your toy collection. The Creature From The Black Lagoon Super Size Action Figure. Dude stands 22 inches tall. This is one purchase I won’t feel Gill-ty about. I’m gonna take him in the bath tub with me too. What? Dude needs moisture constantly. Ain’t nothing wrong with a little man and Creature action in the rub-a-dub-tub!
It beats that cheap knock-off version my mom got me called Preacher From The Black Lagoon. You can only pull the string and hear a sermon somany times before you have to kill it with fire. He did have a kick ass preacher outfit dripping with seaweed though.
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Funko Mopeez Classic Horror Plushies
Feeling mopey? Yeah, me too.It’s cuz I don’t have any of these Funko Mopeez Classic Horror Plushies. I knew I was missing something in my life. It was a bunch of cuddly horror movie killers. You know what else is a horror movie killer? Diarrhea! Well, it’s a movie killer in general. Too many milk duds and a river of coke in my stomach. That’s why I always bring a change of pants to the theater. Lifehacks people!
Baby Cthulhu Toy Art Dolls
Well, looks like Cthulhu spawned some more little terrors. Dude needs to keep his tentacles in his pants. These Baby Cthulhu Toy Art Dolls look cute and cuddly, but they will probably suck your face off and use your nose as a pacifier while the rest of your skin just dangles. While you’re running around screaming without a face. Nasty, I know. It’s how they roll. They should be named pestilence and death. Get ’em away from me! Okay, they’re cute, but totally not worth the loss of my face.