This Zombie Post Apocalyptic Journal will help you keep track of how fast the infection is spreading throughout the population. It is hand-cast using real crushed stone bonded with high quality designer resin. Ohhhhh. Fancy. It has 95 non-ruled, spiral-bound pages, which should be enough room for you to keep a decent survival journal, so that one day when the zombies eat you, some other normal human can find it and pass it on and on, until 5000 years from now they are worshipping you as a God and this is their bible. How sweet is that?
Category: Just Plain Weird
Kitchen Overlord’s Dead Delicious Horror Cookbook
The Kitchen Overlord’s Dead Delicious Horror Cookbook will help you to cook gore-met meals that will scare the bejesus out of your dinner guests. It has 69 recipes that will cover your table with so many eyes, ears, guts, brains and more. Your dinner guests may even call the cops because they will think you are a serial killer. They will want to stop you before you can cook again. It has everything from edible strings of human ears to looping guts that are meant to be pulled apart at the table. The recipes are tailored to Paleo, Gluten-Free, Vegetarian, and Vegan diets.
I think I lost my appetite. It fell somewhere in the entrails and I ain’t digging it out.
Horror Themed PS4 Controllers
These Horror Themed PS4 Controllers are perfect for playing scary horror games in the dark. You can choose from 2 Jason Voorhees versions and one that has Leatherface, chucky and Jason. These are custom handmade controllers. Button mashers? Nah man, I play button slashers! Man, I wish I was rocking a PS4. I’m still playing Atari. I’m keeping it old school. Like really really old school. Like my school is torn down due to asbestos old school and all the kids need to be tested and all the parents are suing.
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Friday the 13th Morphing Mug “Welcome to Camp Crystal Lake”
Drink up and raise a toast to serial killers who like to wear hockey masks. This Friday the 13th Morphing Mug says “Welcome to Camp Crystal Lake”. Wow, thanks man, great to be here. Gonna have a fun time. Quick question: That scream I just heard coming from the woods? Is that normal? Just a bird huh? Okay, cool. One more quick question: That Hockey goalie that I just saw chasing a woman through the woods and holding a machete, what’s up with that? Roleplay huh? Well, she must not have been in the mood, cuz she locked herself in that cabin over there and he broke in with that machete. Then screams and silence. I guess you’re right, they probably had make-up sex and are sleeping now. Okay, seems legit. I’ll stay the week.
Skull Couch Feet
These Skull Couch Feet are like creepy sneakers for your couch. Cuz your couch’s feet get cold people. Give it some scary Nikes. People be like, Damn! Your couch come wit that?” And you’ll be all like, “Sweet ain’t it?” Your couch be all like, “I look good son! Now get me some badass armrests and a tattoo before I swallow one of you fat-asses whole!”
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