Tag: decor

Vertebrae Shot Glasses

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Vertebrae Shot Glasses
Slipped disc? You’re drinking from it. I’m not inebriated. I am In-vertebrae-ated. So there. These Vertebrae Shot Glasses really help you put your back into it when you knock back a drink.

*Feeling tipsy.* Sure, I’ll have another drink. Spine with me.

*More tipsy* Say what do ya call an Egyptian back guy? A Cairo-Practer. Nose, I’m not drunk.

*Far beyond tipsy* Go aheads, click glasses together again. “This is Spinal Tap.” S’okay s’okay. Nosh drunk. Gonna talk to the pretty lady. Hey. Can I get your Lumbar? *Hiccup* Or at least some lumbar support…?

Skeleton Restroom Door Cover

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Skeleton Restroom Door Cover
We’ve all been there. You’re minding your own business, reading the paper, trying to lay some pipeline when somebody opens the door. Hey. What the hell! That’s how this skeleton feels. The Skeleton Restroom Door Cover captures all of the excitement of skeletons pooping and lets you relive the scene all day long.

Hmmm. That headline reads, “Peeping Tom on the loose.” I think they mean this guy.

Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles

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Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles
Bring the terror of the deep to your desk or coffee table with these cool Needle Felted Octopus Tentacles. It came from the deep and now you are in the deep. Caca that is. This 6 piece sculpture consists of 3 different sized tentacles and accompanying wave breaks. They look downright terrifying.

I’ll put them on my table, but if it reaches for my potato chips, I’m laying the smack down. It better not get all touchy feely on me when I’m watching TV. Just cuz you’re made of felt doesn’t mean I’m gonna get felt up. Behave.

Knock-Jaw: Cast Iron Skull Door Knocker

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Knock-Jaw Cast Iron Skull Door Knocker
The Knock-Jaw: Cast Iron Skull Door Knocker lets guests take matters into their own hands when they hit your doorstep. By matters, I mean they take this skeleton’s jaw into their hands and knock on your door. Maybe you can leave some nuts out so they can crush them in this guy’s mouth and have a good treat.

Real nice. Someone shows up at your house and you tell them to eat your nuts.

Hey, I never had guests before. I’m doing my best. Maybe set out some tiny wieners?

In that case, maybe you should just stand outside naked.

Yeah well… Maybe that’s why I invited you over, so I could have a tiny wiener. Snap! Burn son! Oh, that didn’t sound good did it? You’re probably leaving now right? Yeah, a bit awkward. Now I get why the only people who come to the door are UPS guys and random people with bibles.

Zombie Head Magnets

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Zombie Head Magnets
Are all Zombie Head Magnets present and accounted for? Let’s take a head count? Who’s the head zombie here? Oh, you’re all heads. Nevermind then. Carry on. I’m gonna head out now. No offense. You all are welcomed for the heads up.

Put these magnets on your fridge and scare people so they don’t steal your food. Your fridge will look good, but don’t let it go to your head. Ha! I got one last head joke in. You needed another like you need a hole in the head, but still.
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