Tag: etsy

Scary Skull Pens

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Scary Skull Pens
They say that the pen is mightier than the sword. Which is probably why you see so many swashbucklers armed with ball-point pens. Not! Stupid English sayings. I’ll totally destroy a pen with a sword. I can’t show you right now cuz I’m only allowed to use Nerf swords in the house.

You know what pen might be scarier than a sword? These Scary Skull Pens. They have Skulls on top with red eyes. Pretty cool. Does anyone even know how to use these things anymore? Or have we all de-evolved back to monkeys? Well, if you do know how to use one of these things still, these pens are refillable. I’d fill it with calcium obviously, so my pen continues to have strong bones.

Mad Scientist 1:12 Miniature Laboratory Set

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Miniature Laboratory Set
Sweet. A Mad Scientist 1:12 Miniature Laboratory Set. For very tiny Mad Scientists. Why are scientists so mad anyway? Probably because they have to wear lab coats all the time and can’t rock a fancy sweater-vest or UFO Jacket.

I’m buying it. That way if someone ever shrinks me down, I have a lab already set up and can make a potion to make me big again. *Knocks back a test tube full of blue junk.* Glug glug glug. It’s working! It’s working! *Head braeks through the ceiling. Stuck there. Looks around at the roof and birds and stuff.*

Good thing I’m prepared. Ordered another set to keep on the roof in case of exactly this kind of emergency. Now where’d it go. I- Da Fuq? Get away from that lab, squirrel! Is that meth? Oh sh*t. It’s all methed up and coming for me.
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Alien Ties: Dress For Alien Abduction Success

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Alien Ties Dress For Alien Abduction Success
Now we join an alien abduction already in progress…

“Beeble-brix zat-sylum kubri-saq.” Nudges his alien buddy and points at the Alien Tie the victim is wearing.

“Axl-herkl Haw-gab nee-srink!” *LOL* Which translates to, “He worships us. This one deserves extra lube!”

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Piddle Pail: It’s a Lunch Box You Pee In

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Piddle Pail: It's a Lunch Box You Pee In
Piddle Pail. It’s exactly what it sounds like. A lunch box that you pee in. Cuz why not? I get that you have to pee and sometimes the rest room is not available. But making the container out of a lunch box? That’s either genius or some insane asylum inspiration right there.

Just pee in the hose and add to your collection. I hope dad grabbed the right lunch box this morning. Uh-Oh!

Joker Mouse

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Joker Mouse
Why so serious? Because I didn’t like XM? I don’t know, maybe because there’s a friggin’ Joker Mouse threatening me with a knife? Any other questions? No I have never danced with the devil in the pale moonlight. I have a question. Where do you get Joker cards small enough for a mouse?

Wait there for a sec. I just wanna get my toy Batmobile and my Batman and Robin figures. Then run you over. *Vroom Vroom. CRUNCH* Now ask me why I’m so serious! ASK ME!
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