These Pizza Leggings from Etsy seller eatmeclothing(Hey, what’d you say to me) are cheesy and hot. My two favorite food things. Girl, you got some fine pizza legs! Why don’t you put one slice in front of the other and c’mon over here. nom nom nom. Hey, these just taste like leggings! Sorry about all the holes. I’ll patch those with pepperoni if you want. I think I have some sausage around here too. Now, where is that needle and thread? No, you’ll be alright. Just stay away from stray dogs.
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Tag: etsy
City Morgue Body Bag Sleeping Bag
Sleep like the dead in this city morgue sleeping bag.
What happened here lieutenant? I’m not sure sir. Witnesses say he was dead tired and just collapsed and wrapped this body bag around himself. Hmmm. Sounds like another blogger all hopped up on Monster energy drinks and cheetos. It might be that Creepbay guy again. You keep this crime scene clean. I’m gonna talk to forensics and see what they think. He may just be sleeping, but I don’t wanna touch him. Dead bodies are icky! Until I know for sure, nobody gets in or out.
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Fly And Bug Buddy Purse: Livin’ La Vida Larva
What’s all the buzz about this season in fashion? Not those rain boots and hairy legs stockings that Walmart shoppers are rocking this week, that’s for sure. It’s all about accessorizing. If you wanna look fly, you gotta start with maggots and work your way up to full fledged flying pest.
This Fly And Bug Buddy Purse is superfly. Store it in your closet by throwing it on a flystrip.
Blackout Doombox Delivers Monster Beats
This $90 Doombox Boombox will definitely eat your cassette tapes. Just ask the seller, who says that it is radio only. The cassette player doesn’t work. Probably because he punched it in the mouth after it ate his favorite Journey tape. Same thing happened to me in the 80s. Don’t stop believing my ass! It’s hard to hold on to that feeling when your boombox betrays you.
The seller also has a Doombox Sony Watchman Portable TV(Pictured below) for $60 if you like to watch sitcoms framed in monster teeth.
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Space Invaders Future Fossils
Check out these Space Invaders Fossils from Etsy seller ThrowingChicken. I do not condone the tossing of fowl, but you know what this means right? We won! We finally killed those 8-bit suckers! Pew pew pew! Get the UFO for extra points!
Basically they all got shot down and fell into a video game graveyard during the “war of a hundred-thousand quarters” back in the 80s. Then in 2164 someone used a virtual device to go inside of these vintage game machines and dig up all of these fossils and send them back in time so they could sell them on Etsy and make a butt-load of money. Good thinking!
They aren’t so tough without their brightly colored skin stretched over their skulls. I’m getting one cause these guys owe me like 500 quarters. If I can’t have my childhood money back, I can at least have a rock solid corpse.
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