Sure, these Cheese Curl Art Prints are pretty awesome. They have all kinds of cheesy art. There’s a Sasquatch, a cocker spaniel with it’s neck all tilted, the evolution of man in cheese curl form and much more.
About the only thing missing is an art print titled “Fat dude with cheesy puffs all over his shirt, licking his fingers and trying to type”. *Blinding flash* Spoke too soon! That will be a huge seller. Yells, “You gotta pay me royalties!” Damn paparazzi. Read more “Cheese Curl Art Prints”
Tired of friends leaving sweat rings or drink stains on your tabletop? No worries. Try these Cat Butt Coasters: The Quicker Pucker-Upper. Just lay them out when you have company and these little clenched up Cat butts will keep your surfaces clean.
Keep them away from that one guy. You know, that one guy everybody knows, who has to be the joker and like, starts pushing M & M’s through the pink knitting in the center. He’s all like, hey look at this guys. He gives a chocolate suppository to the coaster and embarrasses everybody, so that you regret even inviting him over. Yeah, sadly I am that guy.
These Rhino Hoof Boots make anyone look like Hillary Clinton. Dang! Did he just say that? Bang! Zing! Burn! Well leggo my Eggo and yankle my cankle! Thems some big hoofs! The seller says they were originally made for a Rocksteady costume, (You know, the rhinoceros guy from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) but I guess even he was like, “Yeah, too Hillary for me. Can we slim things up a bit?”
You know now that I see them in mom jeans, they don’t look so bad. I’ve seen far worse. Of course, I worked with elephants for a year.
Did you run away and join the circus?
No way. Talking about that time I worked for Jenny Craig, passing out flyers.
That’s mean!
Tell me about it. Took me a whole year to actually read those flyers. They had a picture of me with the caption, “Do NOT feed this man!” Hurtful! That also explained why I never got paid and why I had to buy my own meals only from them and talk about why I eat my feelings.
Thanks a lot mom. “Oh I talked to some people and got a job for you.”, she said. “They have a very strict eating policy.”, she said. “Just company rules.”
I’m out. Gotta go stuff it all deep down inside. Under a hot apple pie.
This Baby Head Theremin is the scariest musical instrument ever. It’s eyes glow red. And since you play a theremin by moving your hands in the air, you will basically look like you are rubbing a creepy baby head for a long time and making a wish. I wish I had a real musical instrument. I wish you would stop looking at me baby! You’re ruining my performance. I wish you were less creepy. I wish I wasn’t all out of wishes!
Just imagine the creepy music of a theremin combined with this monstrosity. It has some kind of fancy sensor on the top of it’s head where the soft spot is on a baby too, making all the weirder. Read more “Baby Head Theremin”
The Headblade shaver is basically a razor with a little matchbox car attached. Vroom. Vroom. Ride and groom. It lets those bald tough guy types shave their heads super fast and super furious! Well, this one looks like an ATV, which I guess is fine, because it is going off road and onto bald mountain.
Maybe buy two. That way you and a buddy can get some racing action going on another friend’s head. Put some Nintendo figures on these and you can call it Super Mario Shavers. “Why does my head feel all bloody guys?” That’s not blood. It’s red mud. These tires really tear up the track. Quit your crying and keep still. I’m almost caught up to Luigi. Read more “The HeadBlade: A Car Head Shaver That Is Fast And Furious”
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