Tag: novelty

Altered Alien Figurines

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Altered Alien Figurines
We’ve featured FindersCreepers work before. She likes to do naughty things to vintage figurines. The truth is out there and now it is on your knick-Knack shelf. At least until some Man In Black comes and steals it, tells you you never saw it, it was never there, you were mistaken, there is no such thing as Altered Alien Figurines. Screw you MIB. I know what I saw! Great, now there’s an empty spot on my shelf where there’s no dust. Also that MIB left his dark glasses. Let’s check them out.

*Puts glasses on. Sees the words CONSUME, OBEY and SLEEP all over the place.* Pfft! Tell me something I don’t know. *Tosses glasses.*
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The Cubinati: A New World Order Puzzle

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The Cubinati A New World Order Puzzle
The Cubinati! Made by the Illuminati. Who choose to stay away from the paparazzi! They’d rather stay at home and play Yahtzee! That’s just what I heard. Plus it rhymes. Solve this puzzle pyramid and I think you get a free membership in the group.

Perks include being a part of the New World Order and free pizza every Wednesady night! Score! The all-seeing eye is watching so solve it fast or else be dealt with by the elusive secret society. This puzzle will give you something to do while your population is being culled. Look at how happy and totally not brainwashed that girl in the ad looks. Why so serious?
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Friday The 13th Jason Goblet

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Friday The 13th Jason Goblet
Raise a glass… I mean goblet to your favorite hockey mask wearing slasher. This Friday The 13th Jason Goblet features Jason’s mask so you can drink up with him, catch up, shoot the shizz and get good and drunk. I’m gonna see if they have a Freddy Krueger one and then one of you guys can come over and we can smash them together in toasts and make them fight all night long, until we’re slipping and sliding on all of that liquor.

Sounds like a good time to me. Just don’t rob me when I pass out. K? Don’t worry about all that booze on the floor. This happens every weekend. I just mop it up and fill up booze bottles again. No, no. I didn’t do that when you came over. It’s all cool. Nah. I wouldn’t do that.

Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece

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Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece
You know when you are walking outside and you get a spiderweb in your hair? So you scream and try to get it off and you end up on your hands and knees crying? This Spiderweb Hat Spider Headpiece is like that. Only on purpose.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive… Yeah, but practice makes perfect. And I’ve practiced smacking myself all over the head every time I get a spiderweb in my hair. I can no longer remember people’s names, but I’m pretty sure I’m spider-free.

Extra Terrestrial Alien UFO Wine Bottle Holder

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Extra Terrestrial Alien UFO Wine Bottle Holder
Apparently the drinking age on Alpha Centauri is like 2 years old. I know an alien baby when I see one. This guy is probably like 10 months old and they didn’t bother to card him. Now he’s all laying on the bar, kicking at the bottle as he chugs it all down. Dreaming of the day when he’s old enough to fly his own UFO under the influence.

FYI: This Alien Wine bottle holder looks scary as hell without a bottle in it’s mouth. Click the link to check it out.