Home Decor From Hell: Demon Skin Rug

Demon Skin Rug
This Demon Skin Rug really ties the room together. And insures that no one ever enters that room again. Sure, it’s dead, but dead bees can still sting ya. I ain’t takin’ any chances. Look at the tongue on this thing. And the teeth.

Check out the images below to see this thing all laid out on a covered hot tub. That’s exactly where I would put it too if I wanted people to stay out. It’s as good as a sign that says, “this hot tub is protected by Satan and his minions.”

It’s expensive, but the seller says that it can be purchased on “LAY” away. They made a funny. Which I would find hilarious if I weren’t so scared.
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Burned Freddy Krueger Skin Nikes

freddy krueger burned skin nike shoes
If Freddy Krueger escapes the dream world and starts chasing you, you can run away in style while wearing these Burned Freddy Krueger Skin Nikes. They feature a cool print of Freddy’s burnt skin, but not the soles of those he tormented. Heh! I made a funny.

Seriously though, these sneakers are pretty awesome. You’re gonna look like you have burnt Freddy feet. Make sure you wear them in your nightmares. Freddy is either gonna love these and have a beer with you or hate them and cut your ankles off to take them from you because they will be just his size. They look like meat, but are for your feet.
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Freddy Krueger Skin Marble Coasters

freddy krueger drink coasters
One, two, Freddy’s coming for you. Three, four, better lock your door. Five, six, these Freddy Krueger skin coasters are sick! Freddy wants to protect your furniture from drink spills and those horrible sweat rings. What better way to do this than to rip off some of his own flesh and set it down on your table?

You have to hand it to Freddy. He may be all burnt and melted, but one thing he doesn’t have is acne. Butt-ne? Probably. We all have that right! *crickets* No? Just me? No way! Like I’m the only guy rubbing a bottle Clearasil on each cheek! Whatevs!

I bet the skin sticks to your glass when you try to lift it up too. Nasty!

One, two, Freddy’s skin is goo. Three, four, ain’t gonna drink no more. Now I’m scared and have to stay up all night. Damn you Freddy!

Stitched Skin Chest

skin chest
Take that! Suck it you giant Troll. Guys I beat the boss! I’m gonna open the chest. Ewww. Wait! I’m not opening that. It’s looking at me from like every side. This thing is like a Beverly Hills housewife. You need a scalpel to open it up and get the money out! Only this thing ain’t gonna look any better after.

You can’t even try to pick the lock because the damn teeth will snap at you. Oh well, no skin off my chest. Seriously, stop looking at me. What did I say to have you in stitches anyway? You can keep all of your gold and sweet dungeon loot. We’re off to another dungeon. You might want to see a dermatologist pal.
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Apron Of Flesh With Bonus Purse Of Flesh

flesh apronHey, serial killers have to cook too. And nobody likes to stain their clothes. I’m not sure how many people had to die to make this flesh apron, but judging by the amount of eye-holes that I see, there are at least 7 extra people invited to dinner.

I hear ya. It needs an accessory just as fleshy. To flesh it out. You’re thinking, “It’s cool and all, but this outfit needs more skin in the game if I’m gonna buy it”. Well, you can also get a matching Flesh Purse. Now you are all set to host a dinner that your guests will never forget…And never leave.

Yeah, this is from the same Etsy seller that gave us the People Pot Pie, so we already know what’s on the menu.
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