
There’s something on me. Get it off! Get it off! What is it? Oh it’s cute. In the way all things are cute after it’s flesh has vaporized. Look at this Sterling Silver Bat Skeleton Necklace. It’s adorable. Look at him feeding from that woman’s neck. He ain’t gonna stop until she’s completely dry. He’s a little Vampire bat. Who’s the cute wittle vampire wampire bat? He just wants to hug. Hug and suck the life force out of you.
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Tag: style
Victorian Eye Rings

Victorian Eye Rings. No, not rings for your eye. I don’t even know how that would work. No, I mean rings that are eyes. These are super awesome too because you can be all like, “Give me a knuckle sandwich will ya? I’m gonna give you 5 eyes to the face sucka!” Cuz I would have one on each finger. I’d run my tongue across all of them before I punched the dude too, cuz you have to lay on the creepy and psych him out.
Hey, what’s with that third eye in the pic? Is it okay? Looks like it has glaucoma. Looks like we have a Third Eye Blind concert. You walked right into that one. Not really, I kinda put you on a conveyor belt and waited patiently. Who says we can’t all see eye to eye? Put on your eye rings and give me a fist bump.
Bat Wing Heart Necklace: Batman Approves

Here’s one from “Bat” Midler. Did you ever know that you’re my hero? You are the wind beneath my wings. And that wind smells rancid. But that’s only because you had tacos today, so I totally get it. I love you anyway. Here, have this awesome Bat Wing Heart Necklace. Because you’ve flown away with my heart, then taken it back to your bat cave and nibbled on it while hanging upside down and pooping bat poop all over the cave floor.
If bats hang upside down to sleep, do they ever have nightmares and poop all over themselves? Probably. Bats aren’t very smart. Anywho, this awesome necklace makes a great gift for the bat lover in your life. Who doesn’t love bats? I love bats. You love bats. Baseball players are always talking about ’em too. We are all batty for bats.
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Cthulhu Onesie Is Cthulhu Funsie

This Cthulhu Onesie is Cthulhu funsie. An ancient evil has awakened and you get to crawl inside. Cthulhu will keep you warm and toasty, but you will never be sane again. So I guess this onesie is perfect for me, since I’m already not sane. I’m not insane, cuz doesn’t that imply that I’m “In” sane, as in, in the sane? The English language. Now that’s insane. Insane in the membrane!
This fun onesie- I’m calling it a funsie or if a 500 dude gets in it, a ton-sie. This Cthulhu shell for nerd adults will insure that your friends leave you one by one, so that you are always wearing this around the house alone. Just the way it is.
Octopus + Pug Dog = Octopug Necklace

This Octopug Necklace combines two weird things that frighten me, natures Octopus and Natures Pug Dog. Fun fact: Octopi are the only pie I’m scared of. I’ll eat anything else up in a second. The Octopug is nature’s latest mutant creation. It is absolutely Pugnacious! (Just proving I can too use big words, even if I am just guessing at the meaning cuz I heard it somewhere.)
*Wears my new necklace as I walk around town all cool-like* Sup? Pug life yo! Check out my bling bling. I am so awesomely cool now. Thank you dog-tentacled thing!