Tentacle Headband

Tentacle Headband
Tentacle Headband sounds like some kind of octopus themed heavy metal head banging group, but it’s not. It’s a cool new piece of head gear that brings you one suckered tentacle closer to Cthulhu. It’s made from wiggly rubber that gives it an authentic and likely gross feel. Which is what you want from a tentacle.

So it will feel like Cthulhu actually has his tentacle on your head. Not in a pervy way. Get your head out of the gutter. Like he’s saying, “You look FABULOUS. So proud of you. Gonna make you look awesome today. Why do you think I’ve waited for like millions of years ya silly goose. The ancient evil of style has awakened more fab than ever.” *Tentacles mimic hand snaps all around* “Let’s do that foundation girl. How’s the love life. uh-huh. Uh-huh!”

Animated Raccoon Prop Is Crazy As Hell

Can'd Coon
Holy coon in a can batman! If you want to scare the candy-corn riddled poop out of your trick or treaters this year, put this animated raccoon prop in your yard and just watch the local police reports pile up as your neighbors call 911. This ferocious pile of fur pounces out of the trash can, makes snarly sounds and spits some kind of green venom at it’s victims.

It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. It doesn’t want your Halloween candy. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

Click through to see this crazy thing on video.
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Large Spider Belt Buckle

Large Spider Belt Buckle
This Large Spider Belt Buckle is just the spider I need to stand guard outside of my man-junk like a bouncer. What it would be guarding against, I have no idea. You ladies aren’t exactly beating down my zipper. Well, unless you count a few Karate kicks.

Just noticed. This thing has 10 legs. Wait. 10 legs? Just Googled it. Some spiders have 10 legs. WTF? You weren’t creepy and leggy enough? I’m talking to you too Heidi Klum. And you Kelly Ripa.

What has 14 legs, the perfect sized waist, two heads and a cool belt buckle? Answer: Heidi Klum and Kelly Ripa tied together with a belt bearing this buckle while they yak endlessly and slap at each other.
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3-D Horror Houses

https://www.etsy.com/shop/themoonlightmuse?ga_order=price_desc&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=spooky&ref=sr_gallery_36
These 3-D Horror Houses from themoonlightmuse are spooky as hell. They look just like the real houses. The Psycho house, the Adams family and more.

Like my house, they look fine from the outside, but inside? Inside of my house, blood drips down the wall, spirits talk to you and the tap water is all brown and nasty. The blood is because I like to throw tomato sauce against the wall, the spirits talking to you are just me trying to communicate over my 6 foot tall stacks of hoarded newspapers and the tap water only flows brown cuz I mixed up the pipes up when I fixed the crapper last week. See? There’s a reasonable explanation for everything.
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All 47 Vice Presidents With Octopuses On Their Heads

All 47 Vice Presidents With Octopuses On Their Heads
This ink/watercolor print goes Full Veeptopus. Showing all 47 Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads. I know what you’re thinking. Why just the Veeps? Every politician acts like they have an octopus on their head.

Well, I have no idea. I just know that the President is a puppet, being controlled by one giant octopus that lives in the whitehouse ceiling. It doesn’t have suckers on it’s tentacles. Because we are the suckers.
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