This Black Widow costume looks nothing like the spiders I’ve seen crawling around my baseboards. Those aren’t sexy like this one. I usually just stand on my bed shrieking while I call my neighbor to come deal with it. And by “deal with it”, I mean she comes over and slaps me in the face, telling me to man up and grow a pair, because “I’m not your f***ing mommy, so stop calling me!”.
This is followed by a lengthy interrogation about how I got her phone number and why are there pieces of mail with her name on them in my house? Just getting to know my neighbors is all. Jeez. All the while, that scary and creepy 8-legged thing is still on the floor somewhere. By the time I get tazed, it doesn’t even matter, because I wake up a day later. That’s my life.
Click through for more images. Including a shot from the back. Nice egg-sack.
Read more “Black Widow Spider Costume AKA “The Maneater”: Watch Out Boy She’ll Chew You Up”
Let somebody else be in charge of your body and use you as a meat puppet this Halloween. This Alien Mind Control mask is pretty realistic. I should know. I’ve tussled with aliens before. Some of them do tend to put your head up their butts so they can control you.
Damn. These Nerds look good. Show your love of Nerds candy by wearing a 
Halloween is almost here and you know what that means. Yep. My dentist and your dentist are gonna be going to Hawaii in their new private jet. Meanwhile I’m all about cruising through traffic on my moped, trying not to pass out from tooth pain. Was probably that Twix bar and Neco wafer salad I had for lunch.
Oh yeah.