Apparently the drinking age on Alpha Centauri is like 2 years old. I know an alien baby when I see one. This guy is probably like 10 months old and they didn’t bother to card him. Now he’s all laying on the bar, kicking at the bottle as he chugs it all down. Dreaming of the day when he’s old enough to fly his own UFO under the influence.
FYI: This Alien Wine bottle holder looks scary as hell without a bottle in it’s mouth. Click the link to check it out.
This Book Of The Dead Necronomicon iPhone Case lets the book of the dead protect your iPhone. From being dead. It’s compatible with the iPhone 4/4S , iPhone 5/5S, and iPhone 6. Screams of torment sold separately. Book of the dead. Pfft! You get old enough and your high school yearbook starts turning into that.
Damn that face looks cranky. Maybe he’s hungry. Somebody give that thing some lunch. Maybe someone should check it’s diaper, cuz a certain iPhone case looks like Mr. Grumpy pants.
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Wanna turn your fluffy Miss Mittens into a crazy deadly zombie? Well, now you can. These Custom Zombie Cat Figurines will take your fluffy little fuzz-nugget and turn them into rotting undead pus-nuggets. They will make your cat look like he or she just crawled out of the grave and are ready to eat you. Yeah, they don’t look friendly at all. Like they just came back from Stephen King’s pet sematary. Yeah, count me out of that petting session.
Sure, you’re happy to see Mr. Nibbles-worth again. How’ve ya been? I’m so happy you’re back. I missed my sweet wittle puss-puss. So you grab for a can of tuna, but he grabs for your throat. You’re dying on the floor, he’s nipping at your intestines. It’s bad. Bad scene man. That’s why when I bury a pet, I fill that hole up with concrete. If I ever see a block of concrete with a tail slowly lumbering my way, I have time to get the shotgun.
I had a Ouija Board Pillow like this once, but I had to get rid of it. I would wake up in the morning to find a medium and a bunch of other people standing around my bed. I say medium, really she was more like a large, maybe XL. They were getting messages from the pillow based on how me, a human planchette, tossed and turned and which letters I drooled on.
Come to think of it, that wasn’t a medium and a bunch of people. I think those were all ghosts that my drooling tossing and turning conjured up.
Karbonite Killows are pillows featuring horror characters frozen in carbonite like Han Solo. They look ultra comfy. I mean for me, not for these guys all frozen like a freeze pop. They have a facehugger, Freddy, Jason, Leatherface and Pinhead. These are gonna look great lined up together on my couch.
I’m gonna pretend Boba Fett delivered them to my palace, have a party and wait for Luke to rescue his friends. Except I forgot that Luke doesn’t care about these guys. Oh well. They are still gonna look awesome in my place while I sit there like Jabba shoving food in my mouth.