Playmobil Haunted Halloween Victorian Mansion

Playmobil Haunted Halloween Victorian Mansion
I don’t know about you, but every Halloween I like to get the old Playmobil Haunted Halloween Victorian Mansion out and have a spooky time. Then I tell ghost stories to myself until I get so scared I have to turn every light in the house on. *Checks mail* An electric bill of $550 this month? Not bad. Not bad at all.

Cheaper than last month when I watched all those X-Files episodes. Of course that wasn’t just the lights being left on. You have to factor in for all that extra laundry in the washer from wetting the bed. Honestly, someone should just call Adult Protective Services and take me away from myself.
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Phrenology Head Container

Phrenology Head Container
Phrenology. It’s the study of different spots on the head. I think. Like, this area is where my love of bacon comes from. This area is why I keep missing when I pee in the toilet. That area on my wife’s head? That’s why she punches me and tells me to clean it up. I’m pretty sure that’s what it is. Whatever this strange hoodoo is, this Phrenology Head Container is all about that. Plus, you can put candy inside, or whatever you want. Maybe put a fake brain in there and be all doctor like.

Phrenology. It’s not just for smart people anymore. I can haz too.

Classic Monster Dishware

Classic Monster Dishware
This monster dishware from wigoutgraphics is pretty cool. You can serve up monster themed food on them (I’m assuming) like The Creature from the Black Legumes, Frankenstein Franks, even Wolfman Waffles. It’s always a party when you have monster dishware. A monster mash! C’mon you knew that was coming. Oh, that’s awesome. Monster Mashed potatoes!

Classic Monster Dishware

Classic Monster Dishware

Classic Monster Dishware

Bear Oven Mitts With Claws

Bear Oven Mitts With Claws
I don’t know about you, but I’m a real bear in the kitchen and if anybody comes near those muffins I’m gonna slice ’em up real good with my bear claws. Then when I’m all done cooking I’m gonna stuff my face full of muffins and exit the kitchen on all fours, dropping a deuce on the way out. Hey, you humans have your traps, I have mine.

You want some muffins, you gotta cross the steaming minefield and make it out again with the prize. But you won’t, because I’ll be waiting. They’re mine! All mine! *Goes crazy and starts slashing the air with my Bear Oven Mitts With Claws, letting out a huge roar!* Sorry about that. Sugar high. Now back to muffins.

Candy Shop Of Horrors

Candy Shop Of Horrors
Etsy seller GeorgiaPeachdesigns has a real candy shop of horrors, where all of the sugary treats have teeth and bad attitudes. Hey, am I biting you or are you biting me? Stop biting me while I savor your sweetness. This stuff is delicious, but every time I shop here and eat this stuff, my tongue gets all bloody and cut up.

Screw you horror candy. You’re supposed to be a Hershey’s kiss, not a Hershey’s death wish! And you won’t get to the center of that Tootsie Pop. It will bite to the center of you!

Nah. You don’t really eat ’em. They’re earrings and stuff. Frightening!
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