Muffin Tops Baking Cups

muffin topThese Muffin Tops Baking Cups make perfect sense, but I’m considering filing a copyright lawsuit, since they clearly got the idea from me. Sadly, I have been informed that I would lose the case. Why? Because these baking cups can still see their toes. Me? Not so much. And I can’t pick bits of muffin from my tummy in order to lose my bulge.

I’m just jealous that these muffins still fit into their jeans. I leave you with a rap from Amazon.com reviewer Gloria S:

My muffin top is all that
Whole grain
Low fat
I know you want a piece of that
But I just wanna dance!
Ch-checking out my sweet hips
My sugar coated berry lips
I know you wanna get with this
But I’m just here to dance

So back up off of me!
You’re weirding me out!!

I’m an independant lady
So do not try to play me
I run a tidy bakery
The boys all want my cake for free
But if you can’t shake your fakery
Then kiss my muffin top!

Word.

Crap Taxidermy

crap taxidermyWe have seen our share of crap taxidermy here at Creepbay. Now experience Crap Taxidermy the coffee table book. This is a collection of the strangest and weirdest taxidermy from crappytaxidermy.com. That’s right, it’s a website in book form. Because why the hell not? I know some squirrels that still don’t have the internet. They might want to know about this.

This is 96 full-color pages of taxidermy that is crap. It also includes a “Stuff Your Own Mouse” lesson.

Alien Invasion Collectible Motion Guitar Picks

alien guitar picksAliens like to rock too and now they want to help mankind with these alien face guitar picks. These guitar picks have aliens on them, allowing you to rock like your tour-bus UFO just crashed in Roswell. It probably has a tracking device inside that marks you for abduction, because you know, they are recruiting for an intergalactic band.

Why an anal probe and medical procedures are part of the interview process, I have no idea.

Anatomically Correct Chocolate Skulls

chocolate skullTell them you love them(in a creepy way) by giving them the gift of chocolate shaped like a real human skull. These skulls are nicely detailed and super delicious. Alas poor Yorik. I knew him, Horatio. A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. Of quality mouth-watering chocolate. *bows*

Thank you. Thank you. I will be performing Hamlet on stage with this chocolate skull all evening, all chocolate faced like a 5 year old, until I pass out from a sugar high.
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Alien Abduction Soap Dispenser

ufo soapFinally there is a soap dispenser that will wash away the stink of alien abduction. Because the way things are right now you can scrub and scrub and never feel clean. This soap dispenser was designed by Duncan Shotton. This UFO soap dispenser displays an alien abduction as it is happening. One version has the aliens stealing a human, the other a cow.

No matter which version you choose, your hands will be nice and clean even if you want to scream on the inside and remove your alien implant with a steak knife.
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