Tag: accessory

Skull Cameo Necklace

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Skull Cameo Necklace
This skull cameo necklace is all 3D like a real skull. Pretty neat. Pretty cool. Pretty good. Hey, look everybody. Stan Lee is here to make a cameo appearance. And who’s that? Benedict Cumberbatch! Wait, there’s more.

*Throws open the shutters like it’s Christmas morning and I’ve been up all night with the ghost of Christmas something or other!* Shouts, “It really is a cameo necklace! It’s a star-studded cast! Merry Christmas to everyone!”

Teacher says, every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings. You know what else happens? I get a headache.

What? It’s only May? Bah-Humbug. I’m going back to bed until December. Wake me up when I can open presents.
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Cthulhu Potion Necklaces

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Cthulhu Potion Necklaces
Wear these Cthulhu Potion Necklaces from TheCuriousCogsmith and you will never be without potion. Or tentacles. Is it a love potion? I have no idea. Only one way to find out. *Glog glog glog.* Oh yeah. It’s definitely working, cuz I’m in love with these necklaces. Should everything be going hazy and wavy? Is that eye winking at me from within that flailing tentacle? Uh-oh. Here come the magic little elves riding unicorns. Somebody talk me down. I think I’ve been dosed. Shanghaied. Cthulhu-ed. Oh, there he is now, beyond that shimmering gateway. What does he mean “enjoy the trip?” Later guys. I don’t feel so good.
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Coffin Lantern – Go To The Light!

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Coffin Lantern - Go To The Light!
This Coffin Lantern must be what the Grim Reaper holds up when he comes to visit people. You see a lantern like this, you know you’re in trouble. This would look great in your horror themed home. Hey, if moths are attracted to light, do undead moths get attracted to a coffin light? I hope we don’t have a wave of zombie moths because of these things. I might put this outside of my house just to keep others away. Eh, I’m anti-social like that.
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Zombie Graveyard Mobile Phone Holder

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Zombie Graveyard Mobile Phone Holder
This Zombie Graveyard Mobile Phone Holder will give you a cool place to rest your phone. Or, as it shows here, a ten year old iPod that you are still using for some reason. Your phone will look like it sits abandoned in a creepy graveyard, with this guy lurking right behind it. This guy is like some undead Price is Right model, proudly displaying your phone and grunting. He’s got one job to do and he does it well. That job is to hold your phone and look scary. Good job zombie. This will work great for me cuz the only time I even use my phone is to order pizza. It spends the rest of it’s life getting lost.
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Mummified Palmistry Hand

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Mummified Palmistry Hand
Fun story: I thought I was an apprentice practicing palmistry for like two years one time. Turns out I was actually doing what they call “shoplifting”. That’s why I don’t trust gypsies. Anyway, now I know better. Palmistry also will not make you go blind, no matter how many times you do it. That’s a common misconception. It is the art of evaluating a person`s character or future by reading the palm of their hand. I plan on buying this Mummified Palmistry Hand and making a fortune.

*Puts on my gypsy gear.* Take your hands from your pockets. Let me see your palm. Hmmmm. I sense that you are a craftsman. Do you work with a saw? I see a horrible accident that has claimed both your hands!

What was your first clue? The fact that my wrists end in stumps? Or that I have no palm to read?

I was right! Yes! Hey- Why does a guy with no palms enter a Palm Reading shop? And how did you turn the doorknob and open the door?

*The hand-less man suddenly sprouts hands from his coat sleeves, and rips off his mask to reveal an old and gnarled woman, cackling like mad.*

YOU!

*The crazy woman runs out of the shop.*

Damn you gypsy! Why does this kind of thing keep happening to me?
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