Tag: etsy

Skeleton Wedding Cake Toppers

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skeleton wedding cake toppers
Etsy seller splendorlocity sells all kinds of Skeleton Wedding Cake Toppers. Fun fact: Skeletons are ribbed for your pleasure. Nature really has thought of everything.

Anyway, just like a cemetery, or the closet of any Kardashian family member, they have a wide assortment of skeletons. Like the one shown here based on the famous Jack and Rose scene from Titanic. More like Jack Skellington and Rose.

Start your marriage right by putting some bones on your wedding cake. It’s a good reminder that we are all just walking meat sacks on bone frames.
skeleton wedding cake toppers

skeleton wedding cake toppers

Vino De Nosferatu Decanter and Glasses

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Nosferatu Decanter
This Vino De Nosferatu Decanter and Glasses set will let you have a drink with Dracula. Have a nip with Nosferatu. You get free matching table accessories too. Raise a toast. You’ll be Vlad you did. Eck! Your blood tastes terrible. Why do you have to be so negative?

This set looks pretty cool. Way to luxurious and rich for my blood. Which tastes terrible by the way. So don’t invite me over. My blood is a terrible vintage.
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Sexy Halloween Witch Shoes

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witch shoes
Damn. Those are some sexy Halloween witch shoes girl! What do ya say we hook up? I’ll make you curl your toes like a house landed on you. Baby we could- *POOF! Turns into a frog.*

*Poof* I’m back. Dang. Just sayin’ they’re sexy. Oh, it smells like you got something cooking in your cauldron. Also, do I smell bread? Does that make you the Wicked Witch of the Yeast? Is it done yet? Can I eat over? Please? Please?

*Poof!*

Black Onyx Spider Sterling Silver Cuff Bracelet

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https://www.etsy.com/listing/233727581/black-onyx-spider-sterling-silver?ga_order=price_desc&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=spooky&ref=sr_gallery_21
I hate sliders! I mean spiders! I hate the old Sliders TV show too, but for completely different reasons. I guess I’m dealing with a lot of repressed stuff today for that to come bubbling up to the surface. Spiders always do this to me. Anything on 8 legs stresses me out. *Breathing. Finding a place of zen.*

This Black Onyx Spider Sterling Silver Cuff Bracelet gives me an idea. Everytime I kill a spider, I’m gonna encase it in clear plastic so I can wear a spider ring on every finger. Plus have a spider cuff for each arm. That way when I get to the Boss Spider, I can punch it’s lights out with my spider-fists of fury and block it’s strikes with my cuffs.

On second thought that may have been the end an old Nintendo game.

Drinks With Death Halloween Fascinator

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Drinks With Death
This Drinks With Death Halloween Fascinator doesn’t scare me. I’ll drink death under the table. ANOTHER! *Slams shot glass down on the table. Wipes my lips with my arm. Stares intently at death. Then passes out and hits the table after the first drink.*

This fun Halloween Fascinator (That’s a fancy word for putting absurd things on your head.) has a drunken skeleton clutching a cherry-topped cocktail and a light-up brain. Which describes the end of my work day pretty well actually. He’s even laying in the same position, except I’m clutching my computer, not a brain. There are also two eyeballs.
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