Whoa. Looks like Mickey found himself under an atomic bomb. This Zombie Mickey Mouse Skull looks like something the natives would shake at you upon entering Disneyland after the apocalypse. Which would fittingly be referred to as the crappiest place on Earth.
Mickey Mouse? More like Icky Mouse! Or moldy mouse. Here I come to save the dayyyyyy! Wait, wrong mouse. He even has fangs now. Maybe this is what happens when Disney puts all of it’s money into Star Wars.
Ribbit! Hey, look. A giant Monster Toad Head. I should totally kiss it and turn it into a Prince. Just to end it’s imprisonment. *Smooches it’s slimy face.* Well, that didn’t work. He’s still a toad. *Looks in the mirror.* What the deuce?!?! I’m a Prince. And not some dude that’s next in line to run a kingdom. I’m Prince as in Raspberry Beret. The kind you buy from the second hand store. This is friggin’ awesome. *Adjusts my frilly shirt.*
I’m out guys. Tonight I’m gonna party like it’s 1999, which means I have to buy a flip-phone and get ready for Y2K.
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This Taxidermy Bat Candelabra is perfect for your haunted house. What? Everybody doesn’t have one? Mine’s been haunted for ages. By me. Sometimes my guests see a hazy green vapor that looks like ectoplasm and it is accompanied by a horrible stench. And the terrible groaning! Well, that’s what I get for eating the Burger King Black Whopper.
Back to the candelabra. It belongs in my batcave. But first I have to walk through like a mile of guano and clear it with the Elder bat. So I think I’ll pass.
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Holy coon in a can batman! If you want to scare the candy-corn riddled poop out of your trick or treaters this year, put this animated raccoon prop in your yard and just watch the local police reports pile up as your neighbors call 911. This ferocious pile of fur pounces out of the trash can, makes snarly sounds and spits some kind of green venom at it’s victims.
It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. It doesn’t want your Halloween candy. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.
Click through to see this crazy thing on video.
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This Large Spider Belt Buckle is just the spider I need to stand guard outside of my man-junk like a bouncer. What it would be guarding against, I have no idea. You ladies aren’t exactly beating down my zipper. Well, unless you count a few Karate kicks.
Just noticed. This thing has 10 legs. Wait. 10 legs? Just Googled it. Some spiders have 10 legs. WTF? You weren’t creepy and leggy enough? I’m talking to you too Heidi Klum. And you Kelly Ripa.
What has 14 legs, the perfect sized waist, two heads and a cool belt buckle? Answer: Heidi Klum and Kelly Ripa tied together with a belt bearing this buckle while they yak endlessly and slap at each other.
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